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One, two . . .

FZ: Hello! Well, good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to our program tonight. Sorry to keep you waiting so long. Just wanted to make sure that everybody got in before we started up. And I'm also sorry that Flo & Eddie couldn't be with us tonight. Flo-- For those of you who don't know, their lead guitar player was killed three nights ago in Utah, and they're not-- the rest of the band is not feeling too enthusiastic about performance right now. What? Thank you! Thank you! Alright. And now-- What an attractive shirt you have! I'd like to introduce the members of the group to you tonight. This is Ray White on guitar and vocals. Patrick O'Hearn on bass. Terry Bozzio on drums. Eddie Jobson on keyboards and violin. And Bianca, the Bionic Woman, on keyboards and vocals. And, of course, we must begin this program with a song about your feet. The name of this song is, "Stink-Foot."

includes quotes from Dragnet (Schumann/Rósza)

In the dark
Where all the fevers grow
Under the water
Where the shark bubbles blow
In the mornin'
By yer radio
Do the walls close in t' suffocate ya
You ain't got no friends . . .
An' all the others: they hate ya
Does the life you been livin' gotta go, hmmm?
Well, lemme straighten you out
About a place I know . . .
(Now, get yer shoes 'n socks on people,
Because it's right aroun' the corner!)
You go out through the night
An' the whispering breezes
To the place where they keep
The Imaginary Diseases,
Out through the night
An' the whispering breezes
To the place where they keep
The Imaginary Diseases . . .

Now scientists call this disease
Bromidrosis
And well they should
But us regular folks
Who might wear a tennis shoe
Or an occasional python boot
Know this exquisite little inconvenience
By the name of:
STINK FOOT
Y'know, my python boot is too tight
I couldn't get it off last night
A week went by, an' now it's July
I finally got it off
An' my girl-friend cry
"You got STINK FOOT!
STINK FOOT, darlin'
Your STINKING FOOT puts the hurts on my nose!
STINK FOOT! STINK FOOT! I ain't lyin',
Can you rinse it off, d'you suppose?"
Well . . . Here Fido . . . Here Fido . . .
Bring the slippers, little puppy
Fido!
Awright, awright, awright, hey!
Fido, my faithful friend of the canine world
I asked you to bring me the slippers
You didn't bring the slippers
Every night is the same problem
Why do you not bring me the slippers?
"Arf-arf, arf-arf-arf-arf, arf-arf-arf, arf-arf, arf-arf-arf-arf, arf, arf-arf-arf-arf!"
Literally translated this means,
"Oh, Frank, I was so stoned I couldn't keep them in my mouth."
And once again I have to inform you, Fido, my charming little canine friend
That you must be punished, so take your punishment, here it comes . . .
Position one.
Position two.
Position three.
And there we have it, a thoroughly punished poodle, live on stage in Philadelphia, goddamn!
It's SICK!

FZ:

In the beginning GOD made 'the light.' Shortly thereafter GOD made three big mistakes. The first one was THE POODLE. As indicated in Exhibit A. Oh, just a little feedback, don't let it worry ya. Now, when God first constructed the poodle it was an attractive dog. It had hair evenly distributed all over its small piquant charming canine-type body. All the other dogs liked it because it was a regular fella. It had a ha-- It had a ha-- It had a-- It had a haircut just like them, and so it was right in with the other trends that were going on in those days.

Then, God made these other two big mistakes. Mistake number two was MAN. Mistake number three was WO-MAN. Okay. Wo-man looked at the poodle with lust in her heart. And she came up with a plan that was about to reshape civilization itself. She looked at the man and knew the man to be a dumbbell, a chump from the word "Go"--which was one of the first words that we had in the old days. So she turned to the man and she said, "Hey, why don't you go get a job?" And because the man was--shall we say--tepid in the mind, he got up off his booty and went out of the Garden of Eden, got himself a job, pushing a broom for about a dollar-2.98 an hour, brought the money back to the woman, she took the money, went to the hardware store, bought a pair of scissors and a pair of zircon encrusted tweezers!

Then she got a hold of the dog and she clipped on the dog. She modified the coat of the dog. She cleaned off on his back here to make it real nice because she wanted the dog to have a disco look. Then she cleaned off his thorax, pardon me, his medulla, his Managua, and all around here, all around Allentown, she cleaned up, really good. Then, as a matter of fact, right over here, if you'll notice, this is the Sheraton in Allentown, Pennsylvania, where they have that glass of orange juice as big as your finger for 75¢. And then she clipped the-- she clipped the fur off of the snout so that you could see the succulent little black poodle lips--you know what I'm talking about. A lot of you kids out there who might have the kind of a mother with blue hair who likes to go to Miami with one of these things really knows what I'm talking about. Then she took the poodle and she put it over on the side and made it sit up with his little snout in the air. And she walked over and sat on his face.

Purely for demonstration purposes, folks, don't take it seriously. And then, and I don't know how she managed to do this, while she was down there squatting on the poodle snout, she looked deep into the dog's eyes and said these words . . .

Give me
Your dirty love
Like you might surrender
To some dragon in your dreams

Give me
Your dirty love
Like you might surrender
To the dragon in your dreams

I don't want your cheap emotion
I don't want your sweet devotion
Whip me up a little dragon lotion
For your dirty love

Give me
Your dirty love
Like some tacky little pamphlet
In your daddy's bottom drawer

Give me
Your dirty love
I don't believe you never seen
That book before

I don't want your hesitation
I don't want your reservation
I just got one destination
That's your dirty love
Dirty love

Give me
Your dirty love
Just like your mama
Make that fuzzy poodle do

Give me
Your dirty love
Just like your mama
Make that fuzzy poodle do

I don't want your cheap aroma
Or your little-bo-peep diploma
I just gonna put you in a coma
With some dirty love
Some dirty love
That dirty love
That dirty love

THAT POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!
THE POODLE BITES!
THE POODLE CHEWS IT!

FZ: Now that we have everything worked up to a mild roar, we have to present to you a new song. This is-- This particular song deals with the delicate subject of higher education. This particular song is also Cut One, Side One of our new album, Zoot Allures, which is being delivered to you in time for Halloween. And it goes like this . . .

This here song might offend you some
If it does, it's because you're dumb
That's the way it is where I come from
If you've been there too, let me see your thumb

Let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)
Oh, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)

Ah, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)
Oh, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)

Ah, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)
Yeah, let me see your thumb, now
(Let me see your thumb)

Ah, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)
Yeah, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)

Ah, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)
Ah, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)

Ah, ah, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)
Ow! Ah, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)

Oh, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb)
Yeah, let me see your thumb, now
(Let me see your thumb)

Yeah, let me see your thumb, now
(Let me see your thumb)
Oh, let me see your thumb
(Let me see your thumb) Well . . .

Show me your thumb if you're really dumb
Show me your thumb if you're really dumb
Show me your thumb if you're really dumb
Show me your thumb if you're dumb
(Yes, show me your thumb if you're dumb!)

Hey now, better make a decision
(You better make a decision)
Be a moron and keep your position
(You better keep your position)
You oughta know now all your education
(Know all your education)
Won't help you no-how, you're gonna . . .

Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station

Pumpin' the gas every night
Pumpin' the gas every night
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station

Pumpin' the gas every night
Pumpin' the gas every night, oh!
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station

Manny the Camper wants to buy some white
(Wind up workin' in a gas sta . . . Fish!)
(Wind up workin' in a gas station)
Manny the Camper wants to buy some white
(Wind up workin' in a gas sta . . . Fish!)
(Wind up workin' in a gas station)
Manny the Camper wants to buy some white
(Wind up workin' in a gas sta . . . Fish!)
(Wind up workin' in a gas station)
Manny the Camper wants to buy some white
(Wind up workin' in a gas sta . . . Fish!)

Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station
Wind up workin' in a gas station

Yes! I'm only fourteen
Sickly 'n thin
Tried all of my life
Just to grow me a chin
It popped out once
But my dad pushed it in, can you dig it?
Tell me, why did he hurt me?
Lord, he's my next of kin . . .
He's a mex-i-kin

I'm lonely 'n green;
Too small for my shirt
Yes, and if Simmons was here
I could feature my hurt
I'm scared of the future
'N I hope I don't grow
Nobody likes me
'Cause everywhere that I go
They say NO
They say NO
They say NO

Now I am older
Got a place in the town, babe
Yeah, I got a chin on my shoulder
'N it keeps growing down 'n down 'n down
I'm horny 'n lonely
'N I wish I was dead
Somebody tell me
Why am I livin'?
Lord, I wanna be dead instead
That's right, I said
I wanna be dead instead
Okay, now dig this:

I wanna be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
(Yeah!)
I wanna be dead
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I wanna be dead
(Lord, I wanna be dead instead)
In bed
Please kill me
(Be dead in bed, yeah)
'Cause that would thrill me
I wanna be dead
(As sure as my name is Terry Ted, Terry Ted)
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
(Kill me)
I wanna be dead
(Thrill me)
In bed
(Baby, you got to fill me with some love)
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
(Only fourteen)
I wanna be dead
(Sickly and green)
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me

One more time for the world!

I wanna be dead
(Wah-hoo!)
In bed
(I wanna be dead instead)
Please kill me
(Wanna be dead in bed)
'Cause that would thrill me
(Gonna wish my little girl)
I wanna be dead
(Would give me some head, hey-hey hey-hey)
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I wanna be dead
('Cause I'm only fourteen)
In bed
(Sickly 'n green)
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
I wanna be dead
(I'm feelin' really lean
I'm in love, see)
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
(I'm too small for my shirt)
I wanna be dead
(Feature my hurt)
In bed
Please kill me
'Cause that would thrill me
(I wanna be dead instead)
I wanna be dead
In bed
Please kill me
(Baby!)
'Cause that would thrill me
(Don't you wanna
Fulfill me with some love . . .
Lord, I wanna be dead in bed . . . )

Flies all green 'n buzzin' in his dungeon of despair
Prisoners grumble and piss their clothes and scratch their matted hair
A tiny light from a window hole a hundred yards away
Is all they ever get to know about the regular life in the day;
An' it stinks so bad the stones been chokin'
'N weepin' greenish drops
In the room where the giant fire puffer works
'N the torture never stops
The torture never stops
The torture
The torture
The torture never stops.

Slime 'n rot 'n rats 'n snot 'n vomit on the floor
Fifty ugly soldiers, man, holdin' spears by the iron door
Knives 'n spikes 'n guns 'n the likes of every tool of pain
An' a sinister midget with a bucket an' a mop where the blood goes down the drain;
An' it stinks so bad the stones been chokin'
'N weepin' greenish drops
In the room where the giant fire puffer works
'N the torture never stops
The torture never stops
The torture
The torture
The torture never stops.

Flies all green 'n buzzin' in his dungeon of despair
An evil prince eats a steamin' pig in a chamber right near there
He eats the snouts 'n the trotters first
The loins 'n the groins is soon dispersed
His carvin' style is well rehearsed
He stands and shouts
All men be cursed
All men be cursed
All men be cursed
All men be cursed
And disagree, well no-one durst
He's the best of course of all the worst
(He's the best of course of all the worst)
Some wrong been done, he done it first
(Some wrong been done, he done it first)

An' he stinks so bad, his bones been chokin'
'N weepin' greenish drops,
In the night of the iron sausage,
Where the torture never stops
The torture never stops
The torture
The torture
The torture never stops.

Flies all green 'n buzzin' in his dungeon of despair
Who are all those people that he's locked away up there
Are they crazy?
Are they sainted?
Are they zeros someone painted?
It has never been explained since at first it was created
But a dungeon like a sin
Requires naught but lockin' in
Of everything that's ever been
Look at her
Look at him
(Yes, you, right there!)
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in

FZ: Thank you!

Alright!

City of tiny lites
Don't you wanna go
Hear the tiny auto horns
When they tiny blow
Tiny lightnin'
In the storm
Tiny blankets
Keep you warm
Tiny pillows
Tiny sheets
Tiny cookies
That the peoples eat

City of tiny lites
Maybe you should know
That it's over there
In the tiny dirt somewhere
You can see it any time
When you get the squints
From your downers and your wine
You're so big
It's so tiny
Every cloud is silver line-y
The great escape for all of you
Tiny is as tiny do
Tiny is as tiny do
Tiny is as tiny do
Tiny is as tiny do

Alright!

Ah, tell me!
City of tiny lites
(City of tiny lites)
Don't you wanna go
(Don't you wanna go)
Hear the tiny auto horns
(Hear the tiny auto horns)
When they tiny blow
Tiny lightnin'
In the storm
Tiny blankets
Will keep you warm
Tiny pillows
Tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny sheets
Tiny cookies, yeah, yeah
Talkin' bout them tiny cookies
That the peoples eats
(That the peoples eats)
That the peoples eats
(That the peoples eats)
That the peoples eats
(That the peoples eats)
(That the peoples eats)
That the peoples eats
That the peoples eats
(That the peoples eats)
That the peoples eats
That the peoples eats . . .

FZ: It's the Sanzini Brothers Pyramid Trick revisited. Hard core fans, there they are, ladies and gentlemen. Ray White, ladies and gentlemen. Stay tuned for Bianca.

You didn't try to call me, why didn't you try?
I'm so lonely
No matter who I take home, I keep calling your name
And you, (I need you so bad) you're the one babe

Tell me, tell me who's lovin' you now
'Cause it worries my mind and I can't sleep at all
I stayed home on Friday just to wait for your call
And you didn't try, you didn't try, you didn't try
You didn't try to call me

Why didn't you try, I'm so lonely
No matter who I take home, I keep calling your name
Oh, you, (I need you so bad) You're the one babe

Tell me, tell me who's lovin' you now
'Cause it worries my mind and I can't sleep at all
I stayed home on Friday just to wait for your call

I can't say what's wrong or what's right
All you've gotta do is call me babe

You make me feel so excited
I got so hung up on you from the moment that we met
That no matter how I try, I can't keep the tears
from running down my face
I'm all alone in this place

You didn't try to call me
You didn't try to call me
You didn't try to call me
No, no, no, no, no
You didn't try to call me
Early in the morning, yeah
Late in the evening, yeah
You didn't try to call me
You didn't try to call me . . .

FZ: Bianca! The next part of our program is going to feature our charming little rhythm section on a song entitled, "Mars Needs Women."

It was the darkest night
There was no moon in sight
You know the stars ain't shinin'
'Cause the sky's too tight
Heard the scarey wind
I seen the ugly trees
There was a werewolf honkin'
'Long the side of me

I'm mean 'n I'm bad, y'know I ain't no sissy
Got a big-titty girly by the name of Chrissy
Talkin' about her 'n my bike 'n me . . .
'N this ride up the Mountain of Mystery, mystery

It was 11 o'clock upon a Friday night,
You know the girl and me was feeling outta' sight
We had twenty reds and a big ol' pile of weed,
You know we drank some wine and then we LSD'd

Chrissy puked twice and jumped on my bike,
She yelled, "Fire it up, 'cause you know what I like!"
She burned her leg on a tail-pipe then
And yelled, "Shit-a-ree!", and puked again

I noticed even the crickets
Were actin' weird up here
'N so I said,
"Well, come on and let's drink a little beer"
I said, "Gimme summa that what yer suckin' on . . . "
But there was no reply
'Cause she was gone . . .

"Where's those titties I like so well, 'n my goddamn beer!"
Is what I started to yell, then I heard this noise
Like a crunchin' twig, 'n up jumped the Devil . . .
He's about this big . . .

He had a red suit on
An' a widow's peak
An' then a pointed tail
'N like a sulphur reek
Yes, it was him awright,
You know I knew it was
He had some human flesh
Stuck underneath his claws
You know, it looked to me
Like it was titty skin
I said, "You sonofabitch!"
'Cause I was mad at him,
He just got out his floss
'N started cleanin' his fang
So I shot him with my shooter,
Said: BANG BANG BANG

The sucker just laughed 'n said:

Terry:
Oh, put it away . . .
You know, I ate her all up . . . now what you gonna say?

FZ:
You ate my Chrissy?

Terry:
Yeah! Titties 'n all!

FZ:
Well, what about the beer then?

Terry:
Ah . . . Were the cans this tall?

FZ:
Even her boots?

Terry:
Now, would I lie to you?

FZ:
Shit, you musta been hungry!

Terry:
Yeah, this is true.

FZ:
Don't they pay you good
For the stuff you do?

Terry:
Well, you know
I can't complain when the checks come through . . .

FZ:
I want my Chrissy

Terry:
Yeah?

FZ:
I want my beer

Terry:
So what?

FZ:
You just puke it back up, boy
Do you hear?

Terry:
Blow it out your ass, motorcycle man!
I mean, I am the Devil,
Do you understand?
Just what will you give me for your
Titties and beer?
I suppose you noticed this little contract here . . .

FZ:
Yer goddam right, you
Son-of-a-whore

Terry:
Don't call me that!

FZ:
That's about the only reason I learned writin' for . . .
Gimme that paper . . . bet yer ass I'll sign . . .
Because I need a beer,
'N it's titty-squeezin' time!

Terry:
Man, you can't fool me . . . you ain't that bad . . .
I mean you shoulda seen some of the souls that I've had . . .

FZ:
Oh, yeah?

Terry:
There was Milhous Nixon 'n Agnew, too . . .
'N both of those suckers was worse 'n you . . .

FZ:
Well, let's make a deal if you think that's true
I mean, after all you're the Devil, now . . .
Whatcha gonna do? Come on!

Terry: What am I gonna do?
FZ: You can-- You can have my soul . . .
Terry: What?
FZ: It's a mean little sucker, 'bout a thousand years old . . .
Terry: You want me to take . . . ?
FZ: But once you gets it . . .
Terry: Oh, no.
FZ: You can't give it back . . .
Terry: Wha--
FZ: You gotta keep it forever . . .
Terry: Oh . . .
FZ: And that's a natural fact.
Terry: Forever?
FZ: Do you understand me, am I making myself perfectly clear to you?
Terry: Man, well, I don't know if I want you around Hell forever.
FZ: Take my soul.
Terry: I mean . . .
FZ: Take my soul! I don't care.
Terry: Oh, no . . .
FZ: Who needs a soul anymore?
Terry: No, wait a minute, you got those funky things growing in your hear, you . . .
FZ: Really. Who needs it?
Terry: Oh, you're crazy, man!
FZ: I'd rather have beer!
Terry: Wait-- Oh, no, wait, you're freaking me out . . .
FZ: Take my soul, give me the beer.
Terry: You want-- No, wait, hold it, wait!
FZ: Give me the beer and the titties!
Terry: No, hold it, wait, wait, wait!
FZ: Give me the titties!
Terry: Titties, beer, wait!
FZ: Give me more beer.
Terry: WAIT!
FZ: Give me bigger titties!
Terry: No, wait . . . No, wait, please, please . . .
FZ: Bigger titties and more beer. And hockey!
Terry: NO!
FZ: And give me football!
Terry: NOOO!
FZ: And give me baseball!
Terry: Wait!
FZ: And give me titties and beer and television!
Terry: Titties, beer and baseball, with television!
FZ: And give me . . .
Terry: No, wait!
FZ: Give me everything.
Terry: Wait . . .
FZ: Take my soul, but . . .
Terry: God help me.
FZ: Mostly the titties.
Terry: Oh . . .
FZ: Just give me the titties.
Terry: Wait, wait . . . NOOOOO!

Terry:
No! Don't sign it! Give me time to think . . .
I mean . . . hold on, boy . . .
'Cause that's Magic Ink!

And then the Devil puked
'N out jumped m'girl
They heard the titties PLOP-PLOPPIN', that's right!
All around the world

"I GOT ME THREE BEERS 'N A COUPLE OF DOWNS,
AN' I'M GONNA GET RIPPED, SO JUST FUCK YOU CLOWNS!"

Then she gave us the finger,
It was rigid 'n stiff,
That's when the Devil, he farted
An' she went right over the cliff

"OH! . . . "

Oh, she had such a good time going down . . .

The Devil was mad
I took off to my pad
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?
I swear I do declare!
How did she get back there?

FZ: Awright! Now we have a song for lovers only. Pay close attention to this . . .

12. Black Napkins - 18:58^<>

FZ: Awright! Now we have a song for lovers only. Pay close attention to this. This is selection Number Two on Side One of the album and we hope that you'll enjoy it-- Oh, and another thing, I did the Mike Douglas Show yesterday and got a chance-- It's gonna be on November the 10th, and I got a chance to play this song. I played this song with Mike Douglas' studio orchestra. The name of this song is "Black Napkins."

Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh

FZ: And to continue now . . .

Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh
Wee-ee-oooh

13. Advance Romance - 13:56^<>

No more credit
At the liquor store
My suit is all dirty and my
Shoes is all tore
I'm tired and lonely and my
Heart is all sore
Advance romance
I can't use it no more

He told me that he loved me
I believed what he said
He took me for a sucker, boy
All corn-fed
The next thing I knew
He had a bolt on the door
Advance romance
Oh, I can't use it no more

I took Terry's watch
Like I always do
(It was a Timex, too!)
(WAH-HOO
WAH-HOO)
(And a-shame on you)
No more money, boy
I shoulda knew
(They should have told him earlier in the program)
(Shoulda told me too)
The way she do me, boy, well
She might do you, too
The way she do me, boy
She might do you, too
The way she do me, boy
She might do you, too
(Now look what she did to Patrick tonight)

Patrick: Ain't got no power, but the [...]

FZ: Wait, just a moment, we can't be having any of this . . . Tex, come here, quick, and find out why there's no electricity going to the electric bass. We must have some little doodads walking around backstage. Oh, talk amongst yourselves.

Advance romance
Can't use it no more

Potato-head Bobby
Was a friend of mine
He opened three of his eyes
In the food stamp line
He opened four of his eyes
In the food stamp line
He opened five of his eyes
In the food stamp line
He opened six of his eyes
In the food stamp line
Say he might be the Devil
(He might be the Devil, huh huh)
Might be the Devil, ow ow, now now
(Might be the Devil, huh huh)
Well, well, but he sure is fine now
(He might be the Devil, huh huh)
Advance romance
Oh, you wanna try it one time

Later that night
He drop on by
Told me all he wanna do
Was come up and say "Hi"
(HI-HI HI-HI HI-HI HI-HI HI-HI HI-HI HI-HI HI-HI)
Half an hour later
He had frenched his fry
Advance romance
Bobby, say good-bye

Advance romance
Bobby, say good-bye

FZ: Thank you!

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me

He was the Playboy Type (he smoked a pipe)
His fav'rite phrase was "OUTA-SITE!"
He had an Irish Setter
(Hrtch-a-pltch
Hrtch-a-pltch
Hrtch-a-pltch
Arf!)

It was a singles bar, a Tuesday night
The moon was dim, the band was tight
They did the Bump together

What a splendid sight
(Roon doon doon doon)
Her teeth were white
(Oo-ah oo-oooh)
The drinks were cheap (it was Ladies Nite)
He was glad that he met her

She was an office girl ("My name is Betty")
Her fav'rite group was HELEN REDDY
(They discussed the weather)

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!

She was a lonely sort, just a little too short
Her jokes were dumb and her fav'rite sport
Was hockey (in the winter)

He was duly impressed and was quick to suggest
Any sport with a PUCK had to be 'bout the best
As he jabbed his elbow in her (get it honey?)

Later on they went off to where the music was soft,
The candles were drippy, they saw a REAL HIPPY
Who delivered their dinner, there he is!

The rice was brown, and soon they found
That the crowd around that had jammed the room,
Well it seemed to be getting thinner

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!

He took her home to a motor court
She would not kiss him, he tried to ignore it,
But it made him angry!
(Angry! It made me angry!
Why it made me so angry
I COULD HAVE KILLED THAT LOUSY BITCH!)

He called her a slut
(Slut slut slut . . . )
A pig
(Pig pig pig . . . )
And a whore
(Whore whore whore . . . )
A bitch
(Bitch bitch bitch . . . )
And a cunt
(Cunt cunt cunt . . . )
And she slammed the door
(The door!)
In a petulant frenzy!
(A petulant frenzy!
This is a petulant
Frenzy!
I'm petulant,
And I'm having a frenzy!)

On the sofa she weeps
BOO HOO HOO HOO
She weeps and she weeps
BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO
She weeps and she peeps
Through the curtain

He just got in his car
But the battery's dead
So he asked to use the phone
And she gives him some head
And that's the end of the story

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!
Baby don't you want a man sometimes?

FZ: And here he comes . . .

Hi and howdy doody
I'm the union man
You can call me Rudy
Any you boys not paid up on your cards? Huh?
(HUH?)

You know I'm pleased to meet ya
I've been tryin' all day to reach ya
The union's here to help everyone of you
Rock 'n Roll stars, that's right!

You boys know we care a lot
About the way they treat ya
They send a guy like me to every gig

Just to get
A chance to meet ya
To check and see
No wrong's been done
That's one good reason
I carry a gun
I hope the bulge
Don't bum you out
Wanna get a good look?
Let me pull it right out!
Let me pull it right out!
Let me pull it right out!
Let me whip it right out!

Hi and howdy doody
I'm the union man
I'm the union man
I'm the union man
Hi and howdy doody
I'm the union man
You can call me Rudy
Any you boys not paid up on your cards again, how about you?
(HUH?)

Know I'm pleased to meet ya
I been tryin all day to reach ya
'Cause the union's here to help everyone of you
Rock 'n Roll stars, yes!

Welcome to Chicago
Welcome to L.A.
Welcome to our local here
You'll always hear me say
The work is here; It's a couple a bucks
I'm sure you're glad to pay
Whip it out, here's your receipt
Now I'll go away
Now I'll go away
Now I'll go away
Now I'll go away
Away-ay-ay-ay-eh-yeah
Away-ay-ay-ay-eh-yeah
Away-ay-ay-ay-eh-yeah

FZ: Thank you!

includes a quote from The Star-Spangled Banner (Smith/Key)

Remember Freddie and Jo?
The night you went to the show?
(A monster movie);
Clutchin' at yer hand
(Wait ten seconds)
Clutchin' at yer arm
(Wait ten seconds)
Clutchin' at yer elbow--
Where did your brassiere go?
And then the monster came out,
'N everybody shout!
People all around you,
Screamin' at the monster;
The Monster From The U.S.O.

Who's this dude with his hair straight back?
His new white socks, 'n his pants all black;
His T-shirts rolled--
His watch is gold--
A '55 Chevy that his brother just stoled,
And his arm's around yer waist--
His hand is in yer pants--
He asks you for a date
To the servicemen's dance!

Suppose you don't wanna?
What you gonna do?
When a guy like that
Got his hands on you--
Oh, baby!
Tell me baby,
Would you go all the way
For the U.S.O.?
Would you go all the way
For the U.S.A.?
Would you go all the way
For the U.S.O.?
Lift up your dress, if the answer is "no" . . .

Would you go all the way?
Would you go all the way?
Would you go all the way?
Would you go all the way?

Would you go all the way?
Would you go all the way?
Would you go all the way?
Would you go all the way?
Go all the way?
Go all the way?
Go all the way?
No, no
No, no
(No, no . . .)
No no no no no no no
(Oh, maybe I might)
However . . .

includes a quote from Tell Me You Love Me

She's such a dignified lady
She's so pretty and soft
You can't call her a groupie
It just pisses her off
She's got diamonds and jewelry
She's got lotsa new clothes
She ain't hurtin' for money
So that everyone knows

She knows what she wants
She knows what she likes
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Look out . . . she's got her eyes on you

She left her place after midnight
(La la la la la)
And she came to the club
(La la la la-ee-ah!)
You know that her and her partner
(La la la la la)
Came down here lookin' for love
(La la la la-ee-ah!)
They want a guy from a group
(La la la la la)
Who's got a thing in a charts
(La la la la-ee-ah!)
AND IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER
IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER
IF HIS DICK IS A MONSTER
They will give him their hearts

'Cause they know what you got
And they know what they like
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Alright, you got 'em screamin' all night

WORK! WORK! WORKIN' THE WALL!

Daddy, daddy, daddy
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Daddy, daddy, daddy
Awright, you got 'em screamin' all night

includes a quote from Daddy, Daddy, Daddy which includes a quote from Tell Me You Love Me

FZ:
What's a girl like you
Doin' in a place like this?
What, do you hang out in hockey rinks? What is it?

Bianca:
Well . . .

FZ:
What is it with you?

Bianca:
I left my place after midnight

FZ:
Sure you did

Bianca:
And I came to this hall
Me and my girlfriend came here

FZ:
Me too

Bianca:
Lookin' to ball

FZ:
Well, you came to the right place
This is it
This is the swingin'-est place
In all of Philadelphia

Chorus:
NO SHIT!

Bianca:
How true that is!

FZ:
How true indeed

Bianca:
Me and my girlfriend came here
Looking for the
Hot romance we need

FZ:
Right!

Bianca:
We like to get it on--
Do you like, do you like to get it on, too? Yeah, baby

FZ:
Well now, what did you have in mind?

Bianca:
Well I get off bein' juked
With a baby octopus

FZ:
Yeah!

Bianca:
And spewed upon with creamed corn . . .
While my girlfriend digs it
With a Wide Mouth Gatorade bottle

FZ:
Nice

Bianca:
While someone in the background could be screamin', you know what I mean . . .

FZ:
Working the wall

Chorus:
CORKS 'N SAFETIES
PIGS 'N DONKEYS
PUNKY MEADOWS
STEVEN TYLER!

FZ:
That gets me so hot
I could scream

Chorus:
PUNKY MEADOWS, STEVEN TYLER!

FZ:
Oh, boy

Chorus:
PUNKY MEADOWS, STEVEN TYLER!

FZ:
You know you and your girlfriend sound really far out and groovy
Ever been to a Holiday Inn?
Yeah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaa . . .
Magic Fingers in the bed
With a wall-mounted TV screen
Coffee-Host plugged into the bathroom wall
Formica is really keen!

Bianca:
Aw, what kind of girl?

Chorus:
What kind of girl do you think she are?

Bianca:
Aw, what kind of girl?

Chorus:
What kind of girl do you think she are?

Bianca:
I ain't no groupie

Chorus:
Don't call her groupie
That is going too far

Bianca:
Hey, what kind of girl?

Chorus:
She wouldn't ball you
Just because you're a star

Bianca:
No, no. No, no, no, no, no, no

FZ:
Let me tell you the truth, this girl wouldn't let just anybody
Spew on her vital parts, no no!
She wants a guy from a group
With a big hit single in the charts!
Funny I should mention it
Our new single made the charts this week
With a bullet!
With a bullet!
With a bullet!
Just let me readjust my necktie right now
And I will show you how, yes indeed!
A young girl such as you
Might be thrilled and
Overwhelmed by me

Bianca:
What hotel did you say you were staying at?

FZ:
Oh, should I really tell you? I mean
Do you wanna split right away?

Bianca:
Well, uh . . . Not so fast, you silly boy . . .

FZ:
Oh, no, no, no, no . . .

Bianca:
You see, there's something I have to say . . .

Chorus:
She wants a guy from a group who's got a thing in the charts
She wants a guy from a group who's got a thing in the charts
She wants a guy from a group who's got a thing in the charts
She wants a guy from a group who's got a thing in the charts
And if his dick is a monster
If his dick is a monster
If his dick is a monster
They will give him their hearts

includes The Purple Lagoon

I couldn't say where she's coming' from,
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty-dollar bill says you can't make me cum
(No! Y'jes can't do it)

She made a bet with her sister who's a little bit dumb
She could prove it any time all men was scum

I don't mind that she called me a bum,
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum
(So I got down to it)

Whipped off her bloomers 'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation to her sugar plum

I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb
But I still didn't hear no Dinah-Moe Humm,
Dinah-Moe Humm

Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe Humm
Where's this Dinah-Moe
Comin' from
I done spent three hours
An' I ain't got a crumb
From the Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe
From the Dinah-Moe Humm

I got a spot that gets me hot
An' you ain't been to it
I got a spot that gets me hot
An' you ain't been to it
Got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
Got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
But I can't get into it
To get myself out of it
No! I gotta get out of it
To get myself into it
I gotta get into it
To get myself out of it
But I gotta be out of it
To get myself into it

(She looked over me with a glazed eye
And some bovine perspiration on her upper lip area
And she said, now listen this, she said . . . )

Just get me wasted
An' you're half-way there
'Cause if my mind's tore up,
Then my body don't care

I rubbed my chinny-chin-chin
An' said my-my-my
What sort of thing
Might this lady get high upon?

The forty-dollar bill didn't matter no more
When her sister got nekkid an' laid on the floor
She said Dinah-Moe might win the bet
But she could use a little ______ if I wasn't done yet

I told her . . .
Just because the sun
Want a place in the sky
No reason to assume
I wouldn't give her a try

So I pulled on her hair
Got her legs up in the air
An' asked if she had any cooties in there

(Whaddya mean cooties! No cooties on me!)

She was buns-up kneelin'
BUNS UP!
I was wheelin' an dealin'
WHEELIN' AN' DEALIN' AN' OOOOH!
She surrender to the feelin'
SHE SWEETLY SURRENDERED
An' she started in to squealin'

Dinah-Moe watched from the edge of the bed
With her lips just a-twitchin' an' her face gone red
Some drool rollin' down
From the edge of her chin
While she spied the condition
Her sister was in
Boy, she quivered 'n quaked
An' she clutched at herself
While her sister made a joke
About her mental health
Until Dinah-Moe finally
Did give in
But I told her
All she really needed
Was some discipline, I said . . .

Kiss my aura . . . Dora . . .
It's real angora
Would y'all like some more-a?
Right here on the flora?
An' how 'bout you, Fauna?
I can see that Fauna wanna
How about you, Flora?

(Do I wanna?)

I don't know, do you wanna?

(I don't know . . . )

Go ahead, Fauna, swallow it, Fauna, go ahead, swallow it

(Well, I know I have something dirty to do)

Listen, wipe it on this
Awright, now look
D'you think I could interest you
In a pair of zircon-encrusted tweezers?
What you think?

(Well, I don't know if I like tweezers quite enough)

Every night is the same thing!
She tells me she's got a charley horse in her tongue

(But I do have a charley horse in my tongue)

That's an old one, Fauna, listen
No excuses, this time you get the tweezers
We're gonna have to sterilize 'em so . . .
Awright, you're ready?

I couldn't say where she's coming' from
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty-dollar bill say you can't make me cum
(No, no! Y'jes can't do it)

She made a bet with her sister who's a little bit dumb
She could prove it any time all men was scum

I don't mind that she called me a bum,
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum
(So I got down to it)

I whipped off her bloomers 'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation to her sugar plum

I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb
You know I heard some Dinah-Moe Humm
A little Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe . . .

FZ: Ray White on guitar, Patrick O'Hearn on bass, Terry Bozzio on drums, Eddie Jobson on keyboards and violin, Bianca on vocals, tambourine and Fender Rhodes piano. Thanks a lot for coming to the show, oh, wait a minute! Fido on poodle. Hope you enjoyed it. Good night!

FZ: Thank you! Well . . . Alright, here's a little something to get you up on your feet.

FZ: The name of this song is "Stranded In The Jungle." Yes, yes, yes . . .

I crashed in the jungle while trying to keep a date,
With my little girl who was back in the States
Stranded in the jungle, afraid, alone,
Trying to figure a way to get a message back home
But how was I to know that the wreckage of my plane
Had been picked up and spotted, and my girl in Lover's Lane?

Meanwhile, back in the States . . .

Baby, baby, let's make romance
You know, your old-time lover hasn't got a chance
He's stranded in the jungle, stranded as he can be
So, come on pretty baby, just you and me

Meanwhile, back in the jungle . . .

The boys in the jungle had me on the run,
When something heavy hit me, like an atomic bomb
When I woke up, and my head started to clear,
I had a strange feeling I was in cooking gear
I turn around and I looked to see
That's when I found out they was a-cooking me

Great googa-mooga! Let me out of here!

Meanwhile, back in the States . . .

Baby, baby, let's make romance
You know, your old-time lover hasn't got a chance
He's stranded in the jungle, stranded as he can be
So, come on pretty baby, just you and me

Meanwhile, back in the jungle . . .

Well, I jumped out the pot, and I finally got away
Frantic with worry about what my baby'd say
So, I jumped in the ocean and I started to swim
But my chances of survival were getting mighty slim
So, I thumbed down a whale who was heading my way
And I reached the States in about half a day
Now when I got to Lover's Lane, I was almost dead
But my soul was gone, and here's what I said:

Baby, baby, the man is no good
Oh baby, baby, you should have understood
You can trust me as long as I'm free,
So, come back pretty baby where you used to be
'Cause I love you,
'Cause I love you,
'Cause I love you,
'Cause I love you,
'Cause I love you,
'Cause I love you,
'Cause I love you

FZ: Awright awright awright awright . . . Now, let's-- let's shift gears now and go into something else. You-- you won't, you won't believe this, ladies and gentlemen, we're actually going to release a single off of this next album. This is a song-- This is a song that gives advice to the lovelorn, some very specific advice to the young gentlemen in our audience who definitely wanna get laid. This is a-- This is a virtual instruction booklet on how to do it. Okay. The name-- And I know you all need some help, just from up here looking at ya, I know you could use some help. So if you'll-- If you'll follow these instructions carefully I'm sure something will happen to you. The name of this song is "Find Her Finer."

Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her

If you should see a girl on the street, now listen
Now maybe you might think she is sweet
But if you wanna tickle her treat
Now really, what should you do?
(Rat-tat-tat-tat ta-da!)

Don't let her, don't never and
Don't never let her know you are smart
Because the universe is nowhere to start
You know you, you gotta play it straight from the heart
She gwine renunciate you, boy
(That's why you gotta . . . )

Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her
(That's right! Act like a dummy, it always works!)

And furthermore . . .
Now maybe you might think this is rude
And maybe you might think I am crude
And maybe this approach I have spewed
Is not the one for you
(Rat-tat-tat-tat ta-da!)

But believe me later on you gonna find
As you impress her with your mind
That you would just be left behind
For a wiser fool
(So you might as well)

Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her

Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her

Find her finer, sneak up behind her
Wrapped like a mummy till you finally unwind her
Find her blinder, see who designed her
Act like a dummy till you finally grind her

FZ: You got it down, you can really do it. Everybody, act like a dummy! You don't have to go all the way, you don't have to be a complete dummy, you can be a partial dummy. You can even be a closet dummy. There's room for all kinds of dummy in contemporary America. Here's another kind of dummy . . .

She had that
Camarillo brillo
Flamin' out along her head,
I mean her Mendocino bean-o
By where some bugs had made it red

She ruled the Toads of the Short Forest
And every newt in Idaho
And every cricket who had chorused
By the bush in Buffalo

She said she was
A Magic Mama
And she could throw a mean Tarot
And carried on without a comma
That she was someone I should know

She had a snake for a pet
And an amulet
And she was breeding a dwarf
But she wasn't done yet
She had gray-green skin
A doll with a pin
I told her she was awright
But I couldn't come in

And so she wandered
Through the door-way
Just like a shadow from the tomb
She said her stereo was four-way, that's right!
An' I'd just love it in her room

Well, I was born
To have adventure
So I just followed up the steps
Right past her fuming incense stencher
To where she hung her castanets

She stripped away
Her rancid poncho, you got it!
An' laid out naked by the door
We did it till we were un-concho
An' it was useless any more

She had a snake for a pet
And an amulet
And she was breeding a dwarf
But she wasn't done yet
She had gray-green skin
A doll with a pin
I told her she was awright
But I couldn't come in
(actually, I was very busy then, you see)

And so she wandered
Through the door-way
Just like a shadow from the tomb
She said her stereo was four-way
An' I'd just love it in her room

Well, I was born
To have adventure
So I just followed up the steps
Right past her fuming incense stencher
To where she hung her castanets

I chewed my way
Through her rancid panocha
She laid buck nekkid by the door
We did it till we were un-concho
And it was useless anymore
Yes, it was useless anymore
Yes, it was useless anymore

FZ: Alright!

includes The Purple Lagoon

Girl, you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin
He hung around till you found
That he didn't know nuthin'

Girl, you thought he was a man
But he only was a-puffin'
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin'

He shoulda rammed it in there

Girl, you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin

FZ: Everybody sing along! Okay, I'll tell you the words, it's really easy, 'cause I have to sing it so low, so maybe you can't tell what the words are if you don't have the Bongo Fury album you'll never know. The words are, "Girl, you thought he was a man but he was a muffin." And then you say, "He hung around till you found that he didn't know nuthin'." And then you say, "Girl, you thought he was a man but he only was a-puffin'." That's right! And then you say, "No cries is heard in the night as a result of him stuffin'." Okay. Now wait . . .

Girl, you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin (That's right)
He hung around till you found
That he didn't know nuthin'

FZ: A big choral effect here.

Girl, you thought he was a man
But he only was a-puffin' (Don't be shy! Don't be shy)
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin'

FZ: I always felt that the people in this town was-- They were very musical. I thought that if there was any place in the world where we could actually get real live audience participation it would have to be Philadelphia. I mean, look. Just think of me as-- Think as-- Just think of me as sort of an older, more sinister Dick Clark. You know what I mean? Awright, awright. Here it is, ladies and gentlemen, this is the basis of-- This is the basis for communication in America today. I'd like to have each and everyone of you stand up and salute the flag. Here it is. This is your American heritage, right here. 200 years and this is all you get. Right there. Maybe in 200 more years you can have these! And, if evolution takes its natural course, in 1000 years you can do it with your feet, if you still got any.

FZ: Ray! Patrick! Terry! Eddie! Bianca! Fido! Richard Nixon right out there in the-- Thanks for coming by, Dick. He's looking good. He's looking better than I've seen him in weeks. Thanks for coming to the show. Good night.

• Dalszövegek

<< Előző | Következő >>
Albumok

T-1, 27-19.

includes a line from the World's Greatest Sinner soundtrack, Run Home Cues, #2 and part of I Don't Know If I Can Go Through This Again


Oh man, I don't know if I can go through this again!

includes music from the World's Greatest Sinner soundtrack, Oh No and Pound For A Brown variations

includes part of I Don't Know If I Can Go Through This Again

includes a bit of Oh No and A Vicious Circle

includes Oh No, Pound For A Brown variations, Drums Are Too Noisy and a bit of I Don't Know If I Can Go Through This Again

includes part of I Don't Know If I Can Go Through This Again


Okay.
(throat clearing)
Who's playing that with you?
FZ?: The bells.
Harp and the vibes.
FZ (?): Bells, bells.
Do you want me to come a bar shorter there too?
No.
Alright.
(cough)

EC: Uh . . . Uh . . . Uh Uh . . . Uh . . . Uh . . . d'you, are you, ARE YOU HUNG UP? ARE YOU HUNG UP?
Girl: Outa site!
EC: Outa site, yeah --listen, uhm, d'you, are you . . .? ARE YOU HUNG UP?
Girl: Ha ha . . . ! What does that mean?
EC: Are you strung up, are you? ARE YOU HUNG UP?
Girl: I don't . . . I don't . . . I can't understand . . . Outa site!
EC: Outa site, yeah --listen, uhm, d'you, are you . . .? ARE YOU HUNG UP?

Gary Kellgren: One of these days I am going to erase all the tape in the world . . . In the world . . . world . . . Tomorrow I may do it . . . All the Frank Zappa Masters . . . Nothing . . . Blank . . . Empty . . . Space . . . That's what they are now . . . Blank . . . Empty . . . Space . . . Oh, I know he's sitting in there, in the control room now, listening to everything I say, but I really don't care . . . Hello Frank Zappa!

JCB: Hi, boys & girls, I'm Jimmy Carl Black, I'm the Indian of the group!

What's there to live for?
Who needs the peace corps?
Think I'll just DROP OUT
I'll go to Frisco
Buy a wig & sleep
On Owsley's floor

Walked past the wig store
Danced at the Fillmore
I'm completely stoned
I'm hippy & I'm trippy
I'm a gypsy on my own
I'll stay a week & get the crabs &
Take a bus back home
I'm really just a phony
But forgive me
'Cause I'm stoned

Every town must have a place
Where phony hippies meet
Psychedelic dungeons
Popping up on every street
GO TO SAN FRANCISCO . . .

How I love ya, How I love ya
How I love ya, How I love ya Frisco!
How I love ya, How I love ya
How I love ya, How I love ya
Oh, my hair is getting good in the back!

Every town must have a place
Where phony hippies meet
Psychedelic dungeons
Popping up on every street
GO TO SAN FRANCISCO . . .

Hotcha!

First I'll buy some beads
And then perhaps a leather band
To go around my head
Some feathers and bells
And a book of Indian lore
I will ask the Chamber Of Commerce
How to get to Haight Street
And smoke an awful lot of dope
I will wander around barefoot
I will have a psychedelic gleam in my eye at all times
I will love everyone
I will love the police as they kick the shit out of me on the street
I will sleep . . .
I will, I will go to a house
That's, that's what I will do
I will go to a house
Where there's a rock & roll band
'Cause the groups all live together
And I will join a rock & roll band
I will be their road manager
And I will stay there with them
And I will get the crabs
But I won't care

Concentration Moon
Over the camp in the valley
Concentration Moon
Wish I was back in the alley
With all of my friends,
Still running free:
Hair growing out
Every hole in me
AMERICAN WAY
How did it start?
Thousands of creeps
Killed in the park
AMERICAN WAY
Try and explain
Scab of a nation
Driven insane
Don't cry
Gotta go bye bye
SUDDENLY: DIE DIE
COP KILL A CREEP! pow pow pow

Gary Kellgren: Tomorrow I get to do another Frank Zappa creation . . . and the day after that . . . and the day after that . . .

JCB: Hi, boys & girls, I'm Jimmy Carl Black, and I'm the Indian of the group

Concentration Moon
Over the camp in the valley
Concentration Moon
Wish I was back in the alley
With all of my friends,
Still running free:
Hair growing out
Every hole in me
AMERICAN WAY
Threatened by US
Drag a few creeps
Away in a bus
AMERICAN WAY
Prisoner: lock
SMASH EVERY CREEP
IN THE FACE WITH A ROCK

Don't cry
Gotta go bye bye
SUDDENLY: DIE DIE
COP KILL A CREEP! pow pow pow

Mama! Mama!
Someone said they made some noise
The cops have shot some girls & boys
You'll sit home & drink all night
They looked too weird . . . it served them right

Mama! Mama!
Someone said they made some noise
The cops have shot some girls & boys
You'll sit home & drink all night
They looked too weird . . . it served them right

Ever take a minute just to show a real emotion
In between the moisture cream & velvet facial lotion?
Ever tell your kids you're glad that they can think?
Ever say you loved 'em? Ever let 'em watch you drink?
Ever wonder why your daughter looked so sad?
It's such a drag to have to love a plastic Mom & Dad

Mama! Mama!
Your child was killed in the park today
Shot by the cops as she quietly lay
By the side of the creeps she knew . . .
They killed her too.

Pam: Well . . . operator? Hold for a minute, please . . .
FZ: Hello?
Operator: Yes, sir . . .
FZ: Ah, can you call 678-9866?
Operator: Same area code?
FZ: Yes
Operator: Right
FZ: Is that Vicki?
Pam: Yeah . . . He's gonna bump you off yet, he's got a gun, you know . . . (heh heh heh . . . ) If he didn't get ya in Laurel Canyon, he won't get you here
Vicki: Hello?
Pam: Vicki?
Vicki: Yeah
Pam: What's happening?
Vicki: Listen: your father has called me up this . . .
Pam: Now look, just don't panic but just tell me . . .
Vicki: I'm not panicking!
Pam: OK
Vicki: I think my phone's tapped too
Pam: Well don't worry, that's quite alright
Vicki: Alright . . . Your father called me up this afternoon
Pam: Just a sec . . .

Bow tie daddy dontcha blow your top
Everything's under control
Bow tie daddy dontcha blow your top
'Cause you think you're gettin' too old
Don't try to do no thinkin'
Just go on with your drinkin'
Just have your fun, you old son of a gun
Then drive home in your Lincoln

I'm gonna tell you the way it is
And I'm not gonna be kind or easy
Your whole attitude stinks, I say
And the life you lead is completely empty

You paint your head
Your mind is dead
You don't even know what I just said

THAT'S YOU: AMERICAN WOMANHOOD!

You're phony on top
You're phony underneath
You lay in bed & grit your teeth

MADGE, I WANT YOUR BODY!
HARRY, GET BACK!
MADGE, IT'S NOT MERELY PHYSICAL!
HARRY, YOU'RE A BEAST!
Backwards/Forwards:
Don't come in me, in me
Don't come in me, in me
Don't come in me, in me
Don't come in me, in me

MADGE, I . . . MADGE . . . I COULDN'T HELP IT . . .
I . . . DOGGONE IT!

What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
Some say your nose
Some say your toes
(I think it's your mind)
But I think it's YOUR MIND
(Your mind)
I think it's your mind, woo woo

ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF
SYSTEMS BEYOND THEIR CONTROL
A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE & THE GRAY
DESPAIR OF YOUR UGLY LIFE

Where did Annie go
When she went to town?
Who are all those creeps
That she brings around?

ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF LIES YOU BELIEVE
A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE THAT KEEPS
THE YOUNG FROM THE TRUTH THEY DESERVE . . .

Suzy: I don't do publicity balling for you anymore

FZ: The first word in this song is discorporate. It means to leave your body

Discorporate & come with me
Shifting; drifting
Cloudless; starless
VELVET VALLEYS & A SAPPHIRE
SEA: Wah Wah

Unbind your mind
There is no time
To lick your stamps
And paste them in
DISCORPORATE
And we will begin . . .WAH WAH!
(Flower Power Sucks)

Diamonds on velvets on goldens on vixen
On comet & cupid on donner & blitzen
On up & away & afar & a go-go
Escape from the weight of your corporate logo!

UNBIND YOUR MIND
THERE IS NO TIME
Boin-n-n-n-n-n-g
TO LICK YOUR STAMPS
AND PASTE THEM IN
DISCORPORATE
AND WE'LL BEGIN
FREEDOM! FREEDOM!
KINDLY LOVING!
YOU'LL BE ABSOLUTELY FREE
ONLY IF YOU WANT TO BE

Dreaming on cushions of velvet & satin
To music by magic by people that happen
To enter the world of a strange purple Jello
The dreams as they live them are all mellow yellow

UNBIND YOUR MIND
THERE IS NO TIME
Boin-n-n-n-n-n-g
TO LICK YOUR STAMPS
AND PASTE THEM IN
DISCORPORATE
AND WE'LL BEGIN
FREEDOM! FREEDOM!
KINDLY LOVING!
YOU'LL BE ABSOLUTELY FREE
ONLY IF YOU WANT TO BE

YOU'LL BE ABSOLUTELY FREE
ONLY IF YOU WANT TO BE

based on Hey Joe (Roberts); includes a quote from Wild Thing (Taylor)

Hey Punk, where you goin' with that flower in your hand?
Hey Punk, where you goin' with that flower in your hand?

Well, I'm goin' up to Frisco to join a psychedelic band.
I'm goin' up to Frisco to join a psychedelic band.

Hey Punk, where you goin' with that button on your shirt?
Hey Punk, where you goin' with that button on your shirt?

I'm goin' to the love-in to sit & play my bongos in the dirt.
Yes, I'm goin' to the love-in to sit & play my bongos in the dirt.

Hey Punk, where you goin' with that hair on your head?
Hey Punk, where you goin' with that hair on your head?

I'm goin' to the dance to get some action, then I'm goin' home to bed.
I'm goin' to the dance to get some action, then I'm goin' home to bed.

Hey Punk, where you goin' with those beads around your neck?
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those beads around your neck?

I'm goin' to the shrink so he can help me be a nervous wreck . . .

Hey Punk!
Punky!
Hey Punk!
Punk!
Hey Punk!
(Hey Punk!)
Hey Punk!
Hey Punk!
Punky!
(Hey Punk!)
Hey-hey!
(Hey Punk!)
Go man, go . . . go man, go . . .
Just a little bit softer
Golly, do I ever have a lot of soul!
Punk, I think I love you!
Come on, Roy
Questi dominga?

Let me see that nose, it didn't . . .
Orale!
I wanna know for sure!
Leave my nose alone please!
What are you trying to do?
He's gonna stand over there
Bigashi' nunga!
But this is Cheetah
Buirote
Chita!

FZ on the center:
It's one of the most exciting things that's ever happened to me. You know, every time I think about how lucky I am to be in the rock & roll industry, it's SO exciting. You know, when I first got into the rock & roll business I could barely even play the changes to this song on my, on my guitar. But now I'm very proficient at it, I can play the guitar, I can strum it rhythmically, I can sing along with my guitar as I strum. I can strum, sing, dance, I can make merry fun all over the stage. And you know, it's so wonderful to . . . It's wonderful to feel that I'm doing something for the kids, because I know that the kids and their music are where it's at. The youth of America today is so wonderful . . . And I'm proud to be a part of this gigantic mass deception. I hope she sees me twirling, yes . . . I hope she sees me dancing and twirling, I will say: "Hello, dolly!" Is the song over?

FZ on the center:
Boy, this is really exciting, making a rock & roll record. I can't even wait until our record comes out and the teen-agers start to buy it. We'll all be rich and famous! When my royalty check comes I think I'm going to buy a Mustang. No, I think I'll . . . I think I'll get a Corvette. No, I think I'll get a Harley Davidson. No, I don't think I'll buy any of those cars. I think what I will do is I will buy a boat. No, that wouldn't be good either. I think, ah, I'll go into real estate. I think I would like to . . . I think I would like to buy La Cienega Boulevard. No, that wouldn't do any good. Gee, I wonder if they can see me up here, twirling my tambourine and dancing . . .
Maybe after the show one of the girls who sees me up here, singing and twirling my tambourine and dancing, will like me. And she will come over to me and I will walk . . . I will walk up to her and I will smile at her and I will impress her and I will say: "Hello, baby, what's a girl like you doing in a place like this? I'm from a rock & roll band, I think we should . . . "
Is the song over?

Center mumbling:
Ay, ay!
Mingia!
There she is!
Ay!
Buirote.
When do we get paid for this?
Ay, ay!
. . . papa . . . huevos
Huevos?
Rock, bop, rock & roll
Rock, bop . . .
One more time!
Un . . .
Stop sloppy rock & roll
Bop bop bop!
YEAH! WHEEE!

Gary Kellgren: He is working the controls because all producers love to turn knobs . . . They think it is the way they can create . . . I wonder what everyone else is whispering about . . .

Backwards:
Better look around before you say you don't care
Shut your f*** mouth about the length of my hair
How would you survive
If you were alive
Shitty little person?

including a fragment from Heavies (Aerni/Buff) by The Rotations (1963)


YEAH!
Bwa-hah-hah!
Oh, my God . . .

EC: Beautiful! God! It's God! I see God!

Now believe me when I tell you that my song is really true
I want everyone to listen and believe
It's about some little people from a long time ago
And all the things the neighbors didn't know
Early in the morning Daddy Dinky went to work
Selling lamps & chairs to San Ber'dino squares
And I still remember Mama with her apron & her pad
Feeding all the boys at Ed's Cafe!

Whizzing & pasting & pooting through the day . . .
(Ronnie helping Kenny helping burn his poots away!)
And all the while on a shelf in the shed:
KENNY'S LITTLE CREATURES ON DISPLAY!

Ronnie saves his numies on a window in his room
(A marvel to be seen: dysentery green)
While Kenny & his buddies had a game out in the back:
LET'S MAKE THE WATER TURN BLACK

We see them after school in a world of their own
(To some it might seem creepy what they do . . . )
The neighbors on the right sat & watched them every night
(I bet you'd do the same if they was you)

Whizzing & pasting & pooting through the day . . .
(Ronnie helping Kenny helping burn his poots away!)
And all the while on a shelf in the shed:
KENNY'S LITTLE CREATURES ON DISPLAY!

Ronnie's in the Army now & Kenny's taking pills
Oh! How they yearn to see a bomber burn!
Color flashing, thunder crashing, dynamite machine!
(Wait till the fire turns green . . . wait till the fire turns green)
WAIT TILL THE FIRE TURNS GREEN!

Dick Kunc: This would be a little bit of vocal teen-age heaven, right here on Earth!

includes a fragment from Ronnie Sings? and a line from the Run Home, Slow soundtrack


Ronnie Williams: (backwards) Dodn-do-do-dodn-dodn-dodn-dada

The idiot bastard son:
(THE FATHER'S A NAZI IN CONGRESS TODAY . . .
THE MOTHER'S A HOOKER SOMEWHERE IN L.A.)

The idiot bastard son:
(ABANDONED TO PERISH IN BACK OF A CAR . . .
KENNY WILL STASH HIM AWAY IN A JAR)
THE IDIOT BOY!

Motorhead: I never won it because I was too small to start with.

?: How, look out!

Motorhead: I used to drink some bad stuff . . . Wine, all kinds of wine! I would mix seven different varieties . . .

Bunk: Had the hots for [...]

JCB: Wah, wah, wah.

Bunk?: over by the [...]

Motorhead: Thunderbird wine . . . I don't know but I chugged a fifth of White Port once and passed out one day (heh heh) . . . and I drank a quart of beer just before that . . . and we were out riding around in the desert.

Bunk: Anyway . . . Thomas's wine mix is . . . very strange . . .

Try and imagine
The window all covered in green
All the time he would spend
At the church he'd attend . . .
Warming his pew

Kenny will feed him & Ronnie will watch
THE CHILD WILL THRIVE & GROW
And enter the world
Of liars & cheaters & people like you
Who smile & think you know
What this is about

(YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING . . . maybe so)
The song we sing: DO YOU KNOW?
We're listening . . .
THE IDIOT BOY!

Try and imagine
The window all covered in green
All the time he would spend
All the colors he'd blend . . .
Where are they now?

Gary Kellgren: Right now I have two hit records on the charts, but it has not made me any money. It has only brought me fame and glory, and a lot of work. Which I do, really not care to tell . . .

includes second part of What's The Ugliest Part Of Your Body? and part of How Could I Be Such A Fool?

You're a lonely little girl
But your Mommy & your Daddy don't care
You're a lonely little girl

The things they say
Just hurt your heart
It's too late now
For them to start
To understand
The way you feel
The world for them
Is too unreal
So you're lonely, lonely, lonely,
Lonely little girl

ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF
SYSTEMS BEYOND THEIR CONTROL

Where did Annie go
When she went to town?
Who are all those creeps
That she brings around?

A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE & THE GRAY
DESPAIR OF YOUR UGLY LIFE
ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF LIES . . .

Where did Annie go
When she went . . .

There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE
There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE

Who cares if hair is long or short
Or sprayed or partly grayed . . .
WE KNOW THAT HAIR AIN'T WHERE IT'S AT

(there will come a time when you won't even be ashamed if you are fat!)

WAH WAH-WAH WAH

La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la (a-a-ah!)

Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee

WAH WAH-WAH WAH

There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE (dance and love)

There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE (rise above)

Who cares if you're so poor you can't afford
To buy a pair of Mod A Go-Go stretch-elastic pants . . .
THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU CAN EVEN
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHEN YOU DANCE

What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
(Darling, when I . . . )
What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
(Darling, when I look in your eyes . . . )
Some say your nose
Some say your toes
(My dearest, my darling, my . . . darling darling . . . )
But I think it's your MIND . . .
(My darling)
I think it's your mind
(The ugliest part of your darling)
I think it's your mind
(Your mind is ugly)
I think it's your mind
(Your mind . . .)
I think it's your mind
I think it's your mind
I think your mind is the ugliest part of your body
(Your body, your body, your body, your body . . . )
I think your mind is the ugliest part of your body
(Your mind it's ugly)
I think your mind is the ugliest part of your body
(Would you please leave my nose alone!)
(Your body, your body)
(Let go of my nose, my nose, thank you!)
Your body, your body . . .

Do it again!
Do it again!

includes a fragment of I Don't Know If I Can Go Through This Again

We are the other people
We are the other people
We are the other people
You're the other people too
Found a way to get to you . . .

Do you think that I'm crazy?
Out of my mind?
Do you think that I creep in the night
And sleep in a phone booth?

Lemme take a minute & tell you my plan
Lemme take a minute & tell who I am
If it doesn't show,
Think you better know
I'm another person

Do you think that my pants are too tight?
Do you think that I'm creepy?
Lemme take a minute & tell you my plan
Lemme take a minute & tell who I am
If it doesn't show
Think you better know
I'm another person

We are the other people
We are the other people
We are the other people
You're the other people too
Found a way to get to you

We are the other people
We are the other people
We are the other people
You're the other people too
Found a way to get to you

Do you think that I love you . . .
Stupid & blind?
Do you think that I dream through the night
Of holding you near me?

Lemme take a minute & tell you my plan
Lemme take a minute & tell who I am
If it doesn't show
Think you better know
I'm another person

A-ha-hah!
Bwah-ha-ha!
(Cough! Cough!)
Ha ha ha ha!
Nyah-ha-ha!
Ha ha ha . . . ha ha ha ha ha ha . . .
Nyah-ha-ha-ha!
Oh . . . Arbitrary!
Nyah-ha-ha-ha!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
AH HA HA HA HA
AH HA HA HA
Arbitrary!
HA HA
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Bwah ha ha . . . (Cough!)
Mmph ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha (cough! cough!)
AH HA HA HA HA
AH HA HA HA
Arbitrary!
HA HA
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

includes Duodenum, music from The World's Greatest Sinner soundtrack, Run Home Cues, #2, Oh No, a fragment of Hurricane (Sigarlaki), It's From Kansas and I Don't Know If I Can Go Through This Again

Spider: The way I see it, Barry, this should be a very dynamite show.

Doo-wah-de-NUM
Doo-wah-de-NUM
Doo-wah
Doo-wah, doo-wah, doo-wah-d'num
Doo-wah-de-NUM
Doo-wah-diddy-wah
Diddy-waddy-waddy-waddy-waddy-NUM

Doo-wah-de-NUM
Doo-wah-de-NUM
Doo-wah
Doo-wah, doo-wah, doo-WAH-DEE
Doo-wah-de-NUM
Doo-wah-diddy-wah
Diddy-waddy-waddy-waddy-waddy-NUM

Doo-wah-dee-num
(Waddy-num)
Doo-wah-doo-wah-doo-wah-dee-num
(Nummy-num)
[...]
Waddy-one, waddy-num

Yo' mammy nun
Yo' mammy nun
Yo' mammy, mammy, mammy, mammy
Yo' mammy nun
Yo' mam-mammy nun
Who's yo' mammy, who's yo' mammy, mammy nun?

Holy mack'l
Holy mack'l
Holy mack'l
Holy mack'l

Ol' Brown Moses
Way down in Egypt-land
Pick that cotton
Eat that watermelon

Spider: Bit of nostalgia for the old folks!

Gilly: I'm advocating dark clothes.
Becky: If I'm not alone . . . How long have I been asleep?
Gilly: As long as I have.
Maxine: Did you ever live in a drum?
Becky: No.
Maxine: Well then you aren't me.
Gilly: I only dreamt I lived in a drum. Ever since it got dark. Dreaming is hard.
Susan Kelly: Yea, but with nothing over your head?
Gilly: No, just light, over my head. And underneath too.
Susan Kelly: I don't think I could take it without anything over my head.
Maxine: Mm-mmh, me neither.
Becky: Well why don't you go out and see what's out there?
Gilly: Well . . . I don't know if that's what's out there.
Maxine: Now that's a thought.
Gilly: Yes . . .
Maxine: If you'd like . . .
Gilly: But still you can say darker and darker. I don't know what the outside of this thing looks like at all.
Guy #1: I do. It's dark and murky.
John Kilgore: How do you get your . . . your water so dark?
Guy #1: 'Cause I'm paranoid. I'm very paranoid. And the water in my washing machine turns dark out of sympathy.
John Kilgore: Out of sympathy?
Guy #1: Yes.
John Kilgore: Um . . . where can I get that?
Guy #1: At your local drugstore.
John Kilgore: How much?
Guy #1: It's from Kansas.

Motorhead: Bored out .90 over with 3 Stromberg 97's.

Larry: Almost Chinese, huh?
Girl #1: Yeah!
Motorhead: Good bread, 'cause I was making, uh . . . $2.71 an hour.

Motorhead: I keep switching girls all the time, because if I'm able to find a girl with really a groovy car that ain't build up, man, I'll go steady with her for a while until I'd build up her car and blow out the engine!

Motorhead: I worked in a cheesy newspaper company for a while but that was terrible, I wasn't making enough money to build anything.
(LOUIE LOUIE)
Motorhead: And then I worked in a printing company and a coupla gas stations. Oh, at the gas station where I was working my brother just got married, and uh . . . he bought a new car and his wife was having a kid and all this miserable stuff, and he needed a job so I gave him a job at the gas station of which I was fired because, you know, he was gonna work there. And he had his car on the rack and he was lubing and changing tires and everything all the time. And so they got fired because he was goofing off, man, and he just kept taking parts and working on his car day and night. And so he lost that job and he went to work in another gas station. He took that one, you know, so he could feed the kids and that. And I went to work in an aircraft company, and uh . . . I was building these planes. I worked on the XB-70, I was the last welder on there. Yeah but, it was pretty good bread because I was making, uh . . . $2.71 an hour. I was making a hundred and a quarter a week, and uh . . . yeah, it was good enough money to be working on, so I got an Oldsmobile, a groovy Olds. But I was going with this chick at that time. By the time I got the Olds running decently, she went out and tore up the engine, and the trans, and a--her and a girlfriend they get in there and booze it up and tear up the seats. Just ripped the seats completely out. So uh . . . when, I got a '56 Olds, which was this one chick's I was going with, and uh . . . we used to drive out all over the place and finally she got rid of that, and uh . . . I got another pickup!

Oh man, I don't know if I can go through this again!

includes a fragment of Ronnie Sings?, a quote from Merry-Go-Round (Fischer), Amen, A Vicious Circle, King Kong, Drums Are Too Noisy, Kangaroos and Envelops The Bath Tub

Ronnie Williams: Buh-bah-bahdn
Spider: Oh!
John: There it went again..
Spider: It's a little pig . . . with wings
Pig With Wings: EE . . .
Gross Man: I hear you've been having trouble with pigs and ponies!

Left channel:
Calvin: To . . . just the opposite . . . going around to the other direction

Right channel:
Calvin: How 'bout us, don't we get any?
Gail: We don't get any . . .
Calvin: That's very distraughtening
Gail: We don't get any because we're otherwise

Spider: Everything in the universe is . . . is . . . is made of one element, which is a note, a single note. Atoms are really vibrations, you know, which are extensions of THE BIG NOTE, everything's one note. Everything, even the ponies. The note, however, is the ultimate power, but see, the pigs don't know that, the ponies don't know that. Right?
Monica: You mean just we know that?
Spider: Right!

Spider: "Merry Go Round! Merry Go Round! Do-Do-Do-Do Do-Do-Do Do-Do-Do!"

Louis: Grrr . . . Arf arf arf ar-ar-ar-ar-ar! Teeth out there, and ready to attack 'em. . . I had to fight back and hit 'em, like . . . you know . . . hit 'em and hit 'em and hit 'em, and . . . kick 'em and kick 'em and . . .
Roy: Did they get on top of you?
Louis: No, I fought so back, hard back, and, it was . . .
Roy: Hard back?
Louis: White!
Roy: White?
Louis: Yeah, white ugliness
Roy: Did it have teeth?
Louis: And it was two, it was two boogey-men that were on the side and , we were . . . already blocked the entrance, so I had to . . . I had to kick, I had to fight to f-four or five boogey-men in front of me . . .
Roy: Then . . . but maybe he can turn into . . . I wonder if he could maybe be [...] PFFFT!
Louis: Yes, extremely vicious
Roy: I don't know, those po- . . . I heard those ponies are really vicious!
Louis: I know . . . but, I know they're vicious, but they . . .
Roy: Their claws!
Louis: He d-d . . . he doesn't have to be able to do it
Roy: They get on top of you, and they just tear you apart
Louis: I know . . .
Roy: Tee . . .
Louis: Scars over here, see, scars right here. Yeah . . .
Roy: Teeth to limb! Teeth to limb! I mean, toe to ta- . . . man, I hope they don't get him
Louis: Ponies! I-i-if-if, if . . . is . . .
Roy: Was it white? Are you sure it wasn't w-white, I mean, uh, black, or . . .
Louis: Well, I think they're white, but I was too scared to notice their physical . . .
Roy: Gold or something?
Louis: I was too, I was too scared to no . . . n-no . . . uh-no . . . uh-notice their physical, ahh . . . appearance, 'cause they . . . they-they were attackin' me!
Roy: They were?
Louis: Yeah, they were . . . they were attackin' me!
Roy: What were they doin' to you?
Louis: Well, they were . . . they were like, they were . . . comin' and surroundin' me 'n everything else, and they were attackin' me and I had to fight back, fight, fight and fight back and . . . pick up sticks . . .
Roy: Pick-up-sticks?
Louis: Yes, pick up sticks, you know?
Roy: I used to play that game, Pick-up-sticks
Louis: Me too, did you ever play that game?
Roy: Yeah!
Louis: Yes! That's funny! HA HA HA!
Roy: Anyway, come back to the horse . . . back to the horse? To the pony
Louis: HA HA HA HA! Now . . .
Roy: Anyway . . .
Louis: Yes, pony, or . . .
Roy: President . . .
Louis: Or pope, I dunno, ah, I dunno . . .
Roy: I don't know . . .
Louis: Something down there is dangerous.
Roy: Could be a cigar or somethin'
Louis: Yeah . . .
Roy: A cigar?
Louis: A cigar? Naw, you're insane, come on!
Roy: Nohhh, no . . . I remember when I was a . . . no I don't remember. Those were the days!
Louis: Boy, you must spend all your life down here!
Roy: That was before the days of those horses
Louis: Yes, before the days of the . . . all the . . . ow-uh . . . ponies or boogey-men or somethin', what's out there
Roy: But then there was a . . . what was it then? No pimples?
Louis: No, I never did.
Roy: Sure!
Louis: Positively
Roy: You had to have 'em.
Louis: Naw, naw . . .
Roy: You've got one right in your nose right now!
Louis: HA HA HA HA! Scrtch-ch-ch! Scratchin' them . . .
Roy: Boy, I'm gettin' tired, man. We should go . . .
Louis: Oh, yes . . .
Roy: We should go to sleep
Louis: Oh, yeah . . .
Roy: I just hope he comes back . . .
Louis: Yes . . . Listen!
Roy: I think I'll pray for him
Louis: I think I'll join you
Roy: You do yours and I'll do mine . . .
Louis: Okay . . . HA HA HA HA!
Roy: And we'll hope for the best. HEH HEH HEH!
Louis: HA HA HA HA HA! I'll pray for [...] Motorhead
Roy: Now I lay me down to sleep . . .
Roy: Amen!
Louis: Amen . . .

Ronnie Williams:
Oh yeah!
That's just fine!
Come on boys!
Just one more time!

Spider: I think I can explain about . . . about how the pigs' music works
Monica: Well, this should be interesting
Spider: Remember that they make music with a very dense light
John: Yeah
Monica: O.K.
Spider: And remember about the smoke standing still and how they . . . they really get uptight when you try to move the smoke, right?
Monica: Right
John: Yeah?
Spider: I think the music in that dense light is probably what makes the smoke stand still. Any sort of motion has this effect on . . . on the ponies' manes. You know, the thing on their neck
John: Hmm . . .
Spider: As soon as the pony's mane starts to get good in the back any sort of mo . . . motion, especially of smoke or gas, begins to make the ends split.
Monica: Well don't the splitting ends change the density of the ponies' music so it affects the density of the pigs' music, which makes the smoke move which upsets the pigs?
Spider: No, it isn't like that.
John: Well, how does it work?
Spider: Well, what it does is when it strikes any sort of energy field or solid object or even something as ephemeral as smoke, the first thing it does is begins to inactivate the molecular motion so that it slows down and finally stops. That's why the smoke stops. And also have you ever noticed how the the smoke clouds shrink up? When it does that? That's because . . .
John: Oh, yeah.
Spider: That's because the molecules come closer together. It gets much, much smaller, and it goes . . . The cold light makes it get so small, that . . .
Monica: I suppose . . .
Spider: It becomes very, very dense and brittle. This is really brittle smoke.
John: And that's why the pigs don't want you to touch it.
Spider: See, when the smoke gets that brittle what happens when you try to move it is it disintegrates
John: And the pigs get uptight 'cause you know they, they worship that smoke. They salute it every day
Monica: You know we've got something here.
John: And, and, and, and that's the basis of all their nationalism. Like if they can't salute the smoke every morning when they get up . . .
Spider: Yeah, it's a vicious circle. You got it.

Gross Man: Pony!

Larry: Drums are too noisy, 'n you've got no corners to hide in!

John: So when she's beating him over the nose with a tire iron. and then we both jump away and disappear, and the pig will turn around and there'll be this pony.
Spider: Oh no, man . . .
Monica: Oh . . .
Spider & Monica: Kangaroos!
Monica: And then they eat it when they get home.
John: If it's still alive.

Spider: Envelops the bath tub.

Calvin: 'Cause round things are . . . are boring . . . hhh . . .

EC: Uh . . . Uh . . . Uh Uh . . . Uh . . . Uh . . . d'you, are you, ARE YOU HUNG UP? ARE YOU HUNG UP?
Girl: Outa site!
EC: Outa site, yeah --listen, uhm, d'you, are you . . .? ARE YOU HUNG UP?
Girl: Ha ha . . . ! What does that mean?
EC: Are you strung up, are you? ARE YOU HUNG UP?
Girl: I don't . . . I don't . . . I can't understand . . . Outa site!
EC: Outa site, yeah --listen, uhm, d'you, are you . . .? ARE YOU HUNG UP?

Gary Kellgren: One of these days I am going to erase all the tape in the world . . . In the world . . . world . . . Tomorrow I may do it . . . All the Frank Zappa Masters . . . Nothing . . . Blank . . . Empty . . . Space . . . That's what they are now . . . Blank . . . Empty . . . Space . . . Oh, I know he's sitting in there, in the control room now, listening to everything I say, but I really don't care . . . Hello Frank Zappa!

JCB: Hi, boys & girls, I'm Jimmy Carl Black, I'm the Indian of the group!

What's there to live for?
Who needs the peace corps?
Think I'll just DROP OUT
I'll go to Frisco
Buy a wig & sleep
On Owsley's floor

Walked past the wig store
Danced at the Fillmore
I'm completely stoned
I'm hippy & I'm trippy
I'm a gypsy on my own
I'll stay a week & get the crabs &
Take a bus back home
I'm really just a phony
But forgive me
'Cause I'm stoned

Every town must have a place
Where phony hippies meet
Psychedelic dungeons
Popping up on every street
GO TO SAN FRANCISCO . . .

How I love ya, How I love ya
How I love ya, How I love ya Frisco!
How I love ya, How I love ya
How I love ya, How I love ya
Oh, my hair is getting good in the back!

Every town must have a place
Where phony hippies meet
Psychedelic dungeons
Popping up on every street
GO TO SAN FRANCISCO . . .

Hotcha!

First I'll buy some beads
And then perhaps a leather band
To go around my head
Some feathers and bells
And a book of Indian lore
I will ask the Chamber Of Commerce
How to get to Haight Street
And smoke an awful lot of dope
I will wander around barefoot
I will have a psychedelic gleam in my eye at all times
I will love everyone
I will love the police as they kick the shit out of me on the street
I will sleep . . .
I will, I will go to a house
That's, that's what I will do
I will go to a house
Where there's a rock & roll band
'Cause the groups all live together
And I will join a rock & roll band
I will be their road manager
And I will stay there with them
And I will get the crabs
But I won't care
Because . . .

Concentration Moon
Over the camp in the valley
Concentration Moon
Wish I was back in the alley
With all of my friends,
Still running free:
Hair growing out
Every hole in me
AMERICAN WAY
How did it start?
Thousands of creeps
Killed in the park
AMERICAN WAY
Try and explain
Scab of a nation
Driven insane
Don't cry
Gotta go bye bye
SUDDENLY: DIE DIE
COP KILL A CREEP! pow pow pow

Gary Kellgren: Tomorrow I get to do another Frank Zappa creation . . . and the day after that . . . and the day after that . . . also at the same time I get to work with The Velvet Underground which is as shitty a group as Frank Zappa's group

JCB: Hi, boys & girls, I'm Jimmy Carl Black, and I'm the Indian of the group

Concentration Moon
Over the camp in the valley
Concentration Moon
Wish I was back in the alley
With all of my friends,
Still running free:
Hair growing out
Every hole in me
AMERICAN WAY
Threatened by US
Drag a few creeps
Away in a bus
AMERICAN WAY
Prisoner: lock
SMASH EVERY CREEP
IN THE FACE WITH A ROCK

Don't cry
Gotta go bye bye
SUDDENLY: DIE DIE
COP KILL A CREEP! pow pow pow

Mama! Mama!
Someone said they made some noise
The cops have shot some girls & boys
You'll sit home & drink all night
They looked too weird . . . it served them right

Mama! Mama!
Someone said they made some noise
The cops have shot some girls & boys
You'll sit home & drink all night
They looked too weird . . . it served them right

Ever take a minute just to show a real emotion
In between the moisture cream & velvet facial lotion?
Ever tell your kids you're glad that they can think?
Ever say you loved 'em? Ever let 'em watch you drink?
Ever wonder why your daughter looked so sad?
It's such a drag to have to love a plastic Mom & Dad

Mama! Mama!
Your child was killed in the park today
Shot by the cops as she quietly lay
By the side of the creeps she knew . . .
They killed her too.

Pam: Well . . . operator? Hold for a minute, please . . .
FZ: Hello?
Operator: Yes, sir . . .
FZ: Ah, can you call 678-9866?
Operator: Same area code?
FZ: Yes
Operator: Right
FZ: Is that Vicki?
Pam: Yeah . . . He's gonna bump you off yet, he's got a gun, you know . . . (heh heh heh . . . ) If he didn't get ya in Laurel Canyon, he won't get you here
Vicki: Hello?
Pam: Vicki?
Vicki: Yeah
Pam: What's happening?
Vicki: Listen: your father has called me up this . . .
Pam: Now look, just don't panic but just tell me . . .
Vicki: I'm not panicking!
Pam: OK
Vicki: I think my phone's tapped too
Pam: Well don't worry, that's quite alright
Vicki: Alright . . . Your father called me up this afternoon
Pam: Just a sec . . .

Bow tie daddy dontcha blow your top
Everything's under control
Bow tie daddy dontcha blow your top
'Cause you think you're gettin' too old
Don't try to do no thinkin'
Just go on with your drinkin'
Just have your fun, you old son of a gun
Then drive home in your Lincoln

I'm gonna tell you the way it is
And I'm not gonna be kind or easy
Your whole attitude stinks, I say
And the life you lead is completely empty

You paint your head
Your mind is dead
You don't even know what I just said

THAT'S YOU: AMERICAN WOMANHOOD!

You're phony on top
You're phony underneath
You lay in bed & grit your teeth

MADGE, I WANT YOUR BODY!
HARRY, GET BACK!
MADGE, IT'S NOT MERELY PHYSICAL!
HARRY, YOU'RE A BEAST!

Don't come in me, in me
Don't come in me, in me
Don't come in me, in me
Don't come in me, in me

MADGE, I . . . MADGE . . . I COULDN'T HELP IT . . .
I . . . DOGGONE IT!

What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
Some say your nose
Some say your toes
(I think it's your mind)
But I think it's YOUR MIND
(Your mind)
I think it's your mind, woo woo

ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF
SYSTEMS BEYOND THEIR CONTROL
A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE & THE GRAY
DESPAIR OF YOUR UGLY LIFE

Where did Annie go
When she went to town?
Who are all those creeps
That she brings around?

ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF LIES YOU BELIEVE
A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE THAT KEEPS
THE YOUNG FROM THE TRUTH THEY DESERVE . . .

Suzy: I don't do publicity balling for you anymore

FZ: The first word in this song is discorporate. It means to leave your body

Discorporate & come with me
Shifting; drifting
Cloudless; starless
VELVET VALLEYS & A SAPPHIRE
SEA: Wah Wah

Unbind your mind
There is no time
To lick your stamps
And paste them in
DISCORPORATE
And we will begin . . .WAH WAH!
(Flower Power Sucks)

Diamonds on velvets on goldens on vixen
On comet & cupid on donner & blitzen
On up & away & afar & a go-go
Escape from the weight of your corporate logo!

UNBIND YOUR MIND
THERE IS NO TIME
Boin-n-n-n-n-n-g
TO LICK YOUR STAMPS
AND PASTE THEM IN
DISCORPORATE
AND WE'LL BEGIN
FREEDOM! FREEDOM!
KINDLY LOVING!
YOU'LL BE ABSOLUTELY FREE
ONLY IF YOU WANT TO BE

Dreaming on cushions of velvet & satin
To music by magic by people that happen
To enter the world of a strange purple Jello
The dreams as they live them are all mellow yellow

UNBIND YOUR MIND
THERE IS NO TIME
Boin-n-n-n-n-n-g
TO LICK YOUR STAMPS
AND PASTE THEM IN
DISCORPORATE
AND WE'LL BEGIN
FREEDOM! FREEDOM!
KINDLY LOVING!
YOU'LL BE ABSOLUTELY FREE
ONLY IF YOU WANT TO BE

YOU'LL BE ABSOLUTELY FREE
ONLY IF YOU WANT TO BE

based on Hey Joe (Roberts); includes quotes from Wild Thing (Taylor) and My Sharona (Fieger/Averre)

Hey Punk, where you goin' with that flower in your hand?
Hey Punk, where you goin' with that flower in your hand?

Well, I'm goin' up to Frisco to join a psychedelic band.
I'm goin' up to Frisco to join a psychedelic band.

Hey Punk, where you goin' with that button on your shirt?
Hey Punk, where you goin' with that button on your shirt?

I'm goin' to the love-in to sit & play my bongos in the dirt.
Yes, I'm goin' to the love-in to sit & play my bongos in the dirt.

Hey Punk, where you goin' with that hair on your head?
Hey Punk, where you goin' with that hair on your head?

I'm goin' to the dance to get some action, then I'm goin' home to bed.
I'm goin' to the dance to get some action, then I'm goin' home to bed.

Hey Punk, where you goin' with those beads around your neck?
Hey Punk, where you goin' with those beads around your neck?

I'm goin' to the shrink so he can help me be a nervous wreck . . .

Hey Punk!
Punky!
Hey Punk!
Punk!
Hey Punk!
(Hey Punk!)
Hey Punk!
Hey Punk!
Punky!
(Hey Punk!)
Hey-hey!
(Hey Punk!)
Go man, go . . . go man, go . . .
Just a little bit softer
Golly, do I ever have a lot of soul!
Punk, I think I love you!
Come on, Roy
Questi dominga?

Let me see that nose, it didn't . . .
Orale!
I wanna know for sure!
Leave my nose alone please!
What are you trying to do?
He's gonna stand over there
Bigashi' nunga!
But this is Cheetah
Buirote
Chita!

FZ on the left:
It's one of the most exciting things that's ever happened to me. You know, every time I think about how lucky I am to be in the rock & roll industry, it's SO exciting. You know, when I first got into the rock & roll business I could barely even play the changes to this song on my, on my guitar. But now I'm very proficient at it, I can play the guitar, I can strum it rhythmically, I can sing along with my guitar as I strum. I can strum, sing, dance, I can make merry fun all over the stage. And you know, it's so wonderful to . . . It's wonderful to feel that I'm doing something for the kids, because I know that the kids and their music are where it's at. The youth of America today is so wonderful . . . And I'm proud to be a part of this gigantic mass deception. I hope she sees me twirling, yes . . . I hope she sees me dancing and twirling, I will say: "Hello, dolly!" Is the song over?

FZ on the right:
Boy, this is really exciting, making a rock & roll record. I can't even wait until our record comes out and the teen-agers start to buy it. We'll all be rich and famous! When my royalty check comes I think I'm going to buy a Mustang. No, I think I'll . . . I think I'll get a Corvette. No, I think I'll get a Harley Davidson. No, I don't think I'll buy any of those cars. I think what I will do is I will buy a boat. No, that wouldn't be good either. I think, ah, I'll go into real estate. I think I would like to . . . I think I would like to buy La Cienega Boulevard. No, that wouldn't do any good. Gee, I wonder if they can see me up here, twirling my tambourine and dancing . . .
Maybe after the show one of the girls who sees me up here, singing and twirling my tambourine and dancing, will like me. And she will come over to me and I will walk . . . I will walk up to her and I will smile at her and I will impress her and I will say: "Hello, baby, what's a girl like you doing in a place like this? I'm from a rock & roll band, I think we should . . . "
Is the song over?

Center mumbling:
Ay, ay!
Mingia!
There she is!
Ay!
Buirote.
When do we get paid for this?
Ay, ay!
. . . papa . . . huevos
Huevos?
Rock, bop, rock & roll
Rock, bop . . .
One more time!
Un . . .
Stop sloppy rock & roll
Bop bop bop!
YEAH! WHEEE!

Gary Kellgren: He is working the controls because all producers love to turn knobs . . . They think it is the way they can create . . . I wonder what everyone else is whispering about . . .

Backwards:
Better look around before you say you don't care
Shut your f*** mouth about the length of my hair
How would you survive
If you were alive
Shitty little person?

including a fragment from Heavies (Aerni/Buff) by The Rotations (1963)

YEAH!
Bwa-hah-hah!
Oh, my God . . .

EC: Beautiful! God! It's God! I see God!

Now believe me when I tell you that my song is really true
I want everyone to listen and believe
It's about some little people from a long time ago
And all the things the neighbors didn't know
Early in the morning Daddy Dinky went to work
Selling lamps & chairs to San Ber'dino squares
And I still remember Mama with her apron & her pad
Feeding all the boys at Ed's Cafe!

Whizzing & pasting & pooting through the day . . .
(Ronnie helping Kenny helping burn his poots away!)
And all the while on a shelf in the shed:
KENNY'S LITTLE CREATURES ON DISPLAY!

Ronnie saves his numies on a window in his room
(A marvel to be seen: dysentery green)
While Kenny & his buddies had a game out in the back:
LET'S MAKE THE WATER TURN BLACK

We see them after school in a world of their own
(To some it might seem creepy what they do . . . )
The neighbors on the right sat & watched them every night
(I bet you'd do the same if they was you)

Whizzing & pasting & pooting through the day . . .
(Ronnie helping Kenny helping burn his poots away!)
And all the while on a shelf in the shed:
KENNY'S LITTLE CREATURES ON DISPLAY!

Ronnie's in the Army now & Kenny's taking pills
Oh! How they yearn to see a bomber burn!
Color flashing, thunder crashing, dynamite machine!
(Wait till the fire turns green . . . wait till the fire turns green)
WAIT TILL THE FIRE TURNS GREEN!

Dick Kunc: This would be a little bit of vocal teen-age heaven, right here on Earth!

includes a fragment from Ronnie Sings? and a line from the Run Home, Slow soundtrack

Ronnie Williams: (backwards) Dodn-do-do-dodn-dodn-dodn-dada

The idiot bastard son:
(THE FATHER'S A NAZI IN CONGRESS TODAY . . .
THE MOTHER'S A HOOKER SOMEWHERE IN L.A.)

The idiot bastard son:
(ABANDONED TO PERISH IN BACK OF A CAR . . .
KENNY WILL STASH HIM AWAY IN A JAR)
THE IDIOT BOY!

Motorhead: I never won it because I was too small to start with.

?: How, look out!

Motorhead: I used to drink some bad stuff . . . Wine, all kinds of wine! I would mix seven different varieties . . .

Bunk: Had the hots for [...]

JCB: Wah, wah, wah.

Bunk?: over by the [...]

Motorhead: Thunderbird wine . . . I don't know but I chugged a fifth of White Port once and passed out one day (heh heh) . . . and I drank a quart of beer just before that . . . and we were out riding around in the desert.

Bunk: Anyway . . . Thomas's wine mix is . . . very strange . . .

Try and imagine
The window all covered in green
All the time he would spend
At the church he'd attend . . .
Warming his pew

Kenny will feed him & Ronnie will watch
THE CHILD WILL THRIVE & GROW
And enter the world
Of liars & cheaters & people like you
Who smile & think you know
What this is about

(YOU THINK YOU KNOW EVERYTHING . . . maybe so)
The song we sing: DO YOU KNOW?
We're listening . . .
THE IDIOT BOY!

Try and imagine
The window all covered in green
All the time he would spend
All the colors he'd blend . . .
Where are they now?

Gary Kellgren: Right now I have two hit records on the charts, but it has not made me any money. It has only brought me fame and glory, and a lot of work. Which I do, really not care to tell . . .

includes second part of What's The Ugliest Part Of Your Body? and part of How Could I Be Such A Fool?

You're a lonely little girl
But your Mommy & your Daddy don't care
You're a lonely little girl

The things they say
Just hurt your heart
It's too late now
For them to start
To understand
The way you feel
The world for them
Is too unreal
So you're lonely, lonely, lonely,
Lonely little girl
You're lonely . . .

ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF
SYSTEMS BEYOND THEIR CONTROL

Where did Annie go
When she went to town?
Who are all those creeps
That she brings around?

A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE & THE GRAY
DESPAIR OF YOUR UGLY LIFE
ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF LIES . . .

Where did Annie go
When she went . . .

There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE
There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE

Who cares if hair is long or short
Or sprayed or partly grayed . . .
WE KNOW THAT HAIR AIN'T WHERE IT'S AT

(there will come a time when you won't even be ashamed if you are fat!)

WAH WAH-WAH WAH

La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la (a-a-ah!)
La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la (oo-wee-ooh!)

Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)

La la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la
WAH WAH-WAH WAH

There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE (dance and love)

There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE (rise above)

Who cares if you're so poor you can't afford
To buy a pair of Mod A Go-Go stretch-elastic pants . . .
THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU CAN EVEN
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHEN YOU DANCE

What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
(Darling, when I . . . )
What's the ugliest
Part of your body?
(Darling, when I look in your eyes . . . )
Some say your nose
Some say your toes
(My dearest, my darling, my . . . darling darling . . . )
But I think it's your MIND . . .
(My darling)
I think it's your mind
(The ugliest part of your darling)
I think it's your mind
(Your mind is ugly)
I think it's your mind
(Your mind . . .)
I think it's your mind
I think it's your mind
I think your mind is the ugliest part of your body
(Your body, your body, your body, your body . . . )
I think your mind is the ugliest part of your body
(Your mind it's ugly)
I think your mind is the ugliest part of your body
(Would you please leave my nose alone!)
(Your body, your body)
(Let go of my nose, my nose, thank you!)
Your body, your body . . .

includes a fragment of I Don't Know If I Can Go Through This Again

Do it again!
Do it again!

We are the other people
We are the other people
We are the other people
You're the other people too
Found a way to get to you . . .

Do you think that I'm crazy?
Out of my mind?
Do you think that I creep in the night
And sleep in a phone booth?

Lemme take a minute & tell you my plan
Lemme take a minute & tell who I am
If it doesn't show,
Think you better know
I'm another person

Do you think that my pants are too tight?
Do you think that I'm creepy?
Better look around before you say you don't care
Shut your fuckin' mouth about the length of my hair
How would you survive
If you were alive
Shitty little person?

We are the other people
We are the other people
We are the other people
You're the other people too
Found a way to get to you

We are the other people
We are the other people
We are the other people
You're the other people too
Found a way to get to you

Do you think that I love you . . .
Stupid & blind?
Do you think that I dream through the night
Of holding you near me?

Lemme take a minute & tell you my plan
Lemme take a minute & tell who I am
If it doesn't show
Think you better know
I'm another person

A-ha-hah!
Bwah-ha-ha!
(Cough! Cough!)
Ha ha ha ha!
Nyah-ha-ha!
Ha ha ha . . . ha ha ha ha ha ha . . .
Nyah-ha-ha-ha!
Oh . . . Arbitrary!
Nyah-ha-ha-ha!
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
AH HA HA HA HA
AH HA HA HA
Arbitrary!
HA HA
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Bwah ha ha . . . (Cough!)
Mmph ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha (cough! cough!)
AH HA HA HA HA
AH HA HA HA
Arbitrary!
HA HA
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

includes music from The World's Greatest Sinner, Run Home Cues, #2 and Help, I'm A Rock

Capitol Studios, LA, CA
February 13, 1967

The New School, NYC, NY
February 21, 1969


FZ: John Cage's work has had an influence on Lumpy Gravy because of his theories of random happenings and, you know, take your chances and just let it happen and that'll be the, the musical composition. The way Lumpy Gravy was put together was sort of like that--I had a certain number of building blocks to work with, all committed to tape, and at one point I just cut these lengths of tape and just shuffled 'em around, and stuck 'em together, and there are sections that were assembled that way.

Mayfair Studios/Apostolic Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Spider: Light, is just a vibration of the note, too. Everything is. Gotta keep that in mind.

Girl: Is it hard for you to breathe?

Spider: They make music with this very dense light.
Monica: And they, they don't understand?
Spider: No.
John: I know, it's just uh . . .
Spider: I don't understand--do you understand it yourself, I mean, can you really . . . ?
John: No. Not really.
Spider: You see, if we understood it, maybe we could help the pigs understand it.

includes a quote from First Call (Trad.) and music from The World's Greatest Sinner and Run Home Cues, #2

Capitol Studios, LA, CA
March 14, 1967

Sid, you'll have to get on the mike. Ted, why don't you get on this mike right here. Once more. If that's okay. Can't take you anyplace. We're rolling, gentlemen. Unit 3A, take 3.

One, two, three . . .

Capitol Studios, LA, CA
March 14, 1967

Unit 2, take 9. The timp can play a little heavier out there. I'll take it from out there instead of raising you here, please. Thank you. Take 9.

One, two, three, one, two, three . . .

Capitol Studios, LA, CA
March 14, 1967


22.

One, two, three, four . . .

You get that, Frank?
Let's play that back.

KBEY-FM, Kansas City
October 22, 1971


Interviewer: I think that's probably one of the rarest Mothers albums too, you see . . .
FZ: Hard to get, you mean?
Interviewer: Yes, and you hardly ever see it, I just have . . .
FZ: Yeah, I think the rarest one is probably Lumpy Gravy.
Interviewer: I've, I've had that on order for four weeks and they sent in a copy of We're Only In It For The Money because it says on the back of it, "Is this phase one of Lumpy Gravy?" And it won't come in. It's not around.
FZ: No, that's a very rare album. That's my favorite album, actually.
Interviewer: How long did it take to put that all together?
FZ: Lumpy Gravy or . . . ?
Interviewer: Lumpy Gravy, yeah.
FZ: Lumpy Gravy was recorded in uh, mm, say, February or March of '67, and wasn't released until thirteen months later. The orchestral stuff was recorded in February-March, and then the rest of the spoken material was added, say, between October and December '67, after we got back from Europe from our first tour.

Capitol Studios, LA, CA
February-March, 1967

includes part of Up & Down

Apostolic Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Sandy Hurvitz (Uncle Meat)--voice


Uncle Meat: Well, somebody called me anyway and I-- Here I am.
Spider?: I don't want no fucking chick swinging ar--
Uncle Meat: Here-- Somebody called me and here I am and I'm gonna clean your piano, whether you like it or not, because . . . it's my job.
John?: She's-- She's finished, she's-- we can't.
?: We're gonna put her away.
Uncle Meat: Nobody --you're not --nobody's putting me away.
?: We gotta put her in the [...].
Uncle Meat: You're not gonna put me away.
John?: How are we gonna do it?
Uncle Meat: You can't put me away. No one's gonna put me away.
John?: We gotta put her away-- How are we gonna do it?
Uncle Meat: Why do you think you are going to put me away. Well, you can't--
John?: What are we gonna do? Where are we gonna put her? Where are we gonna put the body?
Uncle Meat: But-- I'm always wrecked, you know. I'm really gonna be more wrecked, because of this motorcycle accident and-- 'Cause you know what they do to you, and everyone will know that I'm really ruined, and I won't be able to appear anywhere, you know.
Uncle Meat: Barry. Because--
Guy #1: Who's Barry?
Uncle Meat: Barry!
Guy #2: Why should I be prejudiced against accordions?
John: I'm gonna call the N. Double A, AA.
Guy #2: Who are they?
John: The National Association for the Advancement of Accordions.

Studio Z, Cucamonga, CA
c. 1964

West Village, NYC, NY
late 1967


GZ: Good Lord!
FZ: You like that?
GZ: Yeah. The kid too.
FZ: Scare the piss outa the baby?
GZ: No! At the end of it she went, "Keeeew."
FZ: Mm . . . She likes that stuff.
GZ: Yes, she does actually.
FZ: What's wrong with her?
GZ: Ha ha, ha ha . . .

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Gary Kellgren: Right now I have two hit records on the charts, but it has not made me any money. It has only brought me fame and glory, and a lot of work. Which I do, really not care to tell . . .

JCB: Hi, boys & girls, I'm Jimmy Carl Black, I'm the Indian of the group!

Gary Kellgren: Tomorrow I get to do another Frank Zappa creation . . . and the day after that . . . and the day after that . . . also at the same time I get to work with The Velvet Underground which is as shitty a group as Frank Zappa's group.

JCB: Hi, boys & girls, I'm Jimmy Carl Black, and I'm the Indian of the group.

Gary Kellgren: He is working the controls because all producers love to turn knobs . . . They think it is the way they can create . . . I wonder what everyone else is whispering about . . .

includes part of Oh No

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Mixed Media, Detroit
November 13, 1967


FZ: Have a new album called We're Only In It For The Money, and we're having a problem with the release of this album due to the cover of the album. We had a problem with Absolutely Free too. It took seven months before the problem with Absolutely Free was straightened out. We hope this problem won't take that long. We're Only In It For The Money is completely different than the other two albums. It doesn't even sound like the same band.

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
September 6, 1967

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Ray?: Like, you know, you know what is it, when it [...] the paper [...].
FZ: Let's put that on the album!
Roy: The whole [...].

Ray?:
The idiot bastard son

FZ: Are we supposed to be singing now?
?: [...] the part.
Gary Kellgren?: Yeah. So I'm getting [...]
FZ: Oh, we're not-- I can't hear myself in the--
Gary Kellgren?: What?
FZ: Can't hear myself in the microphone. Do do do . . .

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Boston
1969

David Silver--interviewer


David Silver: On the, on the We're-- on the We're Only In It For The Money album you take a lot of [...] of the hippies, you know, you really . . .
FZ: Uh-uh.
David Silver: . . . show the . . . a disdain for the behaviour, uh . . . What was wrong, what is wrong with the hippies, basicly, you think . . .
FZ: Well, I think that the main thing that I objected to at the time was everybody was uh, so ready to accept Haight-Ashbury and the whole San Francisco hippy scene as what was happening of the universe and uh, flower power and all the rest of that stuff which I do not think was really what was happening or what should happen, and I didn't think that the people who were involved in it believed it, and, uh, if they did believe it they were still [...], because it's-- it was puny and it was, you know . . .
David Silver: What would came through, Frank, was that, you know, you almost coined the term or if you didn't coin the term "Plastic People," and you know . . .
FZ: "Plastic People" dates from before the We're Only In It For The Money album.
David Silver: Yeah. Okay. Uh, you-- The hippies seemed-- Your attitude [...] the hippies were just as plastic, as one dimensional. They were following, they were [...].
FZ: Think the hippies are probably just a hairier version of their parents in most of those cases because the minds at work lurking behind all that hair and beads and the rest of this San Francisco scene weren't truly liberated at all. You know, they're really, uh-- They're just like Shriners.
David Silver: Yeah.
FZ: You know, it was the same sort of thing happening. But they couldn't see it, you know, because they felt, "Well, we look different than those other people, so I guess we are different."
David Silver: Yeah.

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967


EC: The essence of it is that, uhm, that if, if we get enough kids in America playing guitar all the same way, uh, heh-heh-heh-heh, uh, music, music would die and, heh-heh, and the world would be a far happier place, you know?

includes part of How Could I Be Such A Fool?

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

FZ: Hey, kids, let's have a hootenanny!
Team: YEAH!
FZ: We'll have a cheerleading too!
Team: YEAH!
?: A cheerlea--
FZ: Woops! Woopsy daisy. Okay. Alright, I'll be the cheerleader!

Nifty, spiffy, boss and tough
Sure of that and got enough

FZ:You gotta go, "Got enough?" You say "Sure of that" and you say "Got enough?"

Nifty, spiffy, boss and tough
Sure of that
Got enough?

FZ: One more time! One, two . . . One, two . . . Can you say "Sure of that" with him? One, two, one, two . . .

Nifty, spiffy, boss and tough
Sure of that
Got enough?

FZ: Okay. "We've got the team that's on the beam," here we go . . . One, two . . .

We've got the team that's on the beam . . .

FZ: Tee-dee, tee-dee, tee-dee . . .

We've got the team that's on the beam . . .

FZ: Tee-tee, tee-tee, tee-tee, tee . . .

We've got the team that's on the beam
And really hot to the jive
Come on, pukers,
Skim 'em alive!
(Yum yum, eat 'em up!)

FZ: How about "Eat 'em alive" instead of "Skim 'em alive," alright, ready? Faster. One, two . . .

We've got the team that's on the beam
And really hot to the jive
Come on, pukers,
Eat 'em alive!

FZ: Really pronounced good. One, two, one, two . . .

We've got the team that's on the beam
And really hot to the jive
Come on, pukers,
Eat 'em alive!

FZ: You know, how about, a big "YEAAAAH," clapping, you know, like they do at the football game? Do we have a little whistle or something that we can blow? It's one of the best hootenannies I've been to. Now, "Lean to the left, lean to the right, stand up, sit down, fight, fight, fight," okay? Really little voice, "Lean to the left," okay?

Lean to the left,
Lean to the right,
Stand up, sit down,
Fight, fight, fight

FZ: YEAAAAH, team! Whether we get those guys on the football field we'll tear 'em up.

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967

Mayfair Studios/Apostolic Studios, NYC, NY
1967

includes Take Your Clothes Off When You Dance

You're a lonely little girl
But your Mommy & your Daddy don't care
You're a lonely little girl

The things they say
Just hurt your heart
It's too late now
For them to start
To understand
The way you feel
The world for them
Is too unreal
So you're lonely, lonely, lonely,
Lonely little girl

There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE
There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE

Who cares if hair is long or short
Or sprayed or partly grayed . . .
WE KNOW THAT HAIR AIN'T WHERE IT'S AT

(there will come a time when you won't even be ashamed if you are fat!)

WAH WAH-WAH WAH

La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la (a-a-ah!)

Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee
(Diddle-diddle-dee)
Diddle-diddle-dee

WAH WAH-WAH WAH

There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE (dance and love)

There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE (rise above)

Who cares if you're so poor you can't afford
To buy a pair of Mod A Go-Go stretch-elastic pants . . .
THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU CAN EVEN
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHEN YOU DANCE

Mayfair Studios, NYC, NY
1967


EC: Eh, yeah, I do have some last words, let me-- I would like to say something in conclusion. I'd like to join hands across the sea and say thank you very much for having me here and generally being so kind and everything and uh, I'd like you to know that all of us back in England will be thinking of you, wherever you may be.

• Dalszövegek

(Frank Zappa)

2008. 9. 26

<< Előző | Következő >>
Albumok

FZ: Now this is a new song--you haven't heard this one before. The name of this tune is, "Honey, Don't You Want A Man Like Me?" One, two, three, four . . .

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me

He was the Playboy Type (he smoked a pipe)
His fav'rite phrase was "OUTA-SITE!"
He had an Irish Setter
(Hrtch-a-pltch
Hrtch-a-pltch
Hrtch-a-pltch)

It was a singles bar, a Tuesday night
The moon was dim, the band was tight
They did the Bump together

What a splendid sight
Her teeth were white
The drinks were cheap (it was Ladies Nite)
He was glad that he met her

She was an office girl ("My name is Betty")
Her fav'rite group was HELEN REDDY
(They discussed the weather)

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!

She was a lonely sort, a little too short
Her jokes were dumb and her fav'rite sport
Was hockey (in the winter)
( . . . Yeah . . . damn it!)

He was duly impressed and was quick to suggest
Any sport with a PUCK had to be 'bout the best
As he jabbed his elbow in her

Later on they went off to where the music was soft,
The candles were drippy, they saw a REAL HIPPY
Who delivered their dinner

The rice was brown, and soon they found
That the crowd around that had jammed the room,
Well it seemed to be getting thinner

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!

He took her home to a motor court
She wouldn't kiss him, he tried to ignore it,
But it made him angry!

He called her a slut
A pig
And a whore
A bitch
And a cunt
And she slammed the door
In a petulant frenzy!

On the sofa she weeps
She weeps and she weeps
She weeps and she peeps
Through the curtain

He just got in his car
But the battery's dead
So he asked to use the phone
And she gives him some head
And that's the end of the story

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!
Baby don't you want a man sometimes?

FZ:

And now, ladies and gentlemen, we bring you direct from the front page of the Police Gazette a true story, a real true story about a real person now functioning--well, not functioning too well, 'cause they caught him--formerly functioning in the Midwest under the name of the Illinois Enema Bandit. Has anybody here ever heard of the Illinois Enema Bandit?

I see we have some perverts in this audience tonight. I wasn't quite sure when we got to Virginia, because they always told me that Virginia was for lovers, but now I know that it is possible that in the future Virginia may be for perverts, because you know about the Illinois Enema Bandit. Well, for those of you who are new to the world of perversion--some of you might have actually come, come to this institution to get an education, and we're gonna see what we can do to help you along with it.

Now, the Illinois Enema Bandit--his real name is Michael Kenyon, they caught him recently. And what they caught him doing was, breaking into the homes of college-educated women wearing a ski mask, carrying a briefcase that contained some rope, a little pistol, a thermometer, and a gleaming red enema bag.

Now this enterprising young gentleman (ahem) would, uh--he's getting his costume on right now--this enterprising young gentleman would come in there and capture the college-educated woman unawares, force her to lie on her stomach and then tie her up and, uh, holding a gun at her head and everything, you know, being really ominous, then he would take her temperature to make sure that she was okay, and then he would go in, and he would fill his bag up in the bathroom and he'd sneak back in there to the room and he'd go . . . Voot! Vip! Glug, glug, gluggity glug glug, gluggity glug about a quart and a half's worth, VOOT! Stand her up, let her trot into the bathroom, poot it all out while he was jerking off in the corner. And then he would say, "Don't call the police for at least five minutes if you know what's good for ya! HA HA HA HA!"

Here it is now, ladies and gentlemen, the Illinois Enema Bandit. We have this special song that deals with his life and times. It goes like this . . .

The Illinois Enema Bandit
I heard he's on the loose
I heard he's on the loose
Lord, the pitiful screams
Of them college-educated women . . .
For he'd be just tyin' 'em up
(They'd be all bound down!)
Be just pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

The Illinois Enema Bandit
I heard it on the news
I heard it on the news
Bloomington Illinois . . . he has caused some alarm
Just sneakin' around there
From farm to farm
Got a rubberized bag
And a hose on his arm
Searchin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
Searchin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
Searchin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna . . .

The Illinois Enema Bandit
Some day he's gonna pay
Some day he's gonna pay
The police will say, "Sucker! You's under arrest!"
And the judge will have him for a special guest
The D.A. will order a secret test
Stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest
Put out a call for the jury folks
And the judge would say, "No poo-poo jokes!"
They'll drag in the bandit for all to see,
Sayin' "Don't nobody, have no sympathy . . .
HOT SOAPY WATER in the FIRST DEGREE!"
And the Bandit might say, "Why is everybody always pickin' on me?"

WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
BANDIT, TELL ME DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
Well, one girl shout: "Let the Bandit be!"

WELL ARE YOU GUILTY?
BANDIT TELL ME WHAT'S YOUR PLEA?
Another girl shout: "Let the fiend go free!"

WELL ARE YOU GUILTY?
BANDIT, TELL ME, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS?
You know what the bandit said?
He said, "It must be just what they all need . . . "
(Enemas)
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
(Flushing out)
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
(Cushy cushy)
"It must be just what they all . . . "
Stay tuned, folks, for . . .

includes quotes from Listen To The Music (Tom Johnston) and Light Cavalry Overture (von Suppé)

I coulda swore her hair was made of rayon
She wore a Milton Bradley Crayon
But she was something I could lay on
Can't remember what became of me . . .
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy

She put a Doobie Brothers tape on
I had a Roger Daltrey cape on
(Roger Daltrey cape on)
There was a bed I dumped her shape on
Can't remember what became of me . . .
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy

Somewhat later on
I woke up and she was gone
There was dew out on the lawn
In the sunrise
Later she came back
With a rumpled paper sack
Which she told me would contain
A surprise

She stuck her hand right in it to the bottom
Said she knew I'd be surprised she got 'em
Take a Charleston pimp to spot 'em
Then she gave a pair of shoes to me . . .
(Look at that sucker!)
Plastic leather, 14 triple D

I said: "I wonder what's the shoes for?"
She told me: "Don't you worry no more!"
And got right down there on the tile floor
Now Darling STOMP ALL OVER ME! . . .
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy

Is this something new
Having people stomp on you?
Is it what I need to do
For your pleasure?
(Of all the things to do)
"What is this, a quiz?
Don't Managua what it is
It is merely just a moment
I can treasure . . . "

By ten o'clock her arms and legs were rendered
She couldn't talk 'cause her mouth had been extendered
Looked to me as though she had been blendered
But was this abject misery?
No! No!
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy!
But was this abject misery?
No! No!
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy!
(She likes it that way.)

But was this abject misery?
No! No!
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy!
But was this abject misery?
No! No!
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy!

It might seem strange to Herb and Dee--
Carolina Hardcore Ecstasy!

You're a lonely little girl
(Crunchy crunchy, yum yum yum-yum)
But your Mommy & your Daddy don't care
You're a lonely little girl, oh yeah

The things they say
Just hurt your heart
It's too late now
For them to start
To understand
The way you feel
The world for them
Is too unreal
For you're lonely, lonely, lonely,
Lonely little girl
Oh, baby, poor baby . . .

Every night you sit in your room
Right by your radio
Reading your books
Pictures of the idol you love

The words that he sings
The way that he looks
In a picture on the wall
There's a tear in his eye-ay-ay eye-ay-ay eye-ay-eye

There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE
There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE

Who cares if hair is long or short
Or sprayed or partly grayed . . .
WE KNOW THAT HAIR AIN'T WHERE IT'S AT

(There will come a time when you won't even be ashamed if you are fat!)

WAH WAH-WAH

There will come a time when everybody
Who is lonely will be free . . .
TO SING & DANCE & LOVE

There will come a time when every evil
That we know will be an evil . . .
THAT WE CAN RISE ABOVE

Who cares if you're so poor you can't afford
To buy a pair of Mod A Go-Go stretch-elastic pants . . .
THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU CAN EVEN
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHEN YOU DANCE
WAH WAH-WAH WAH
THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU CAN EVEN
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHEN YOU DANCE
WAH WAH-WAH WAH
THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU CAN EVEN
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHEN YOU DANCE

includes a quote from It Can't Happen Here

What's the ugliest
(OWW!)
Of your body?
What's the ugliest
(wee-wee-ooh)
Of your body?
(Dow-dow-dow-dow)
Some say your nose
(Ay!)
Some say your toes
But I think it's YOUR MIND

ALL YOUR CHILDREN ARE POOR
UNFORTUNATE VICTIMS OF
SYSTEMS BEYOND THEIR CONTROL
A PLAGUE UPON YOUR IGNORANCE & THE GRAY
DESPAIR OF YOUR UGLY LIFE

Where did Annie go
When she went to town? . . .

What was that? What happened? Where am I? In Kansas?

It can't happen here . . .

includes a quote from Mary Had A Little Lamb (Hale/Mason/Mozart)

Norma Jean Bell:
Hey yeah, yeah
Some folks know about it
Some don't
Some will learn to shout it
Some won't
Sooner later, baby, yeah, here's the day to say
We're gonna have to get
Hey hey
Unh
Said I wanna
Said I wanna
Write it, y'all

FZ: This is André Lewis, ladies and gentlemen. He has a device that's called a melodica. I think there's only about a dozen of these in existence. It's a thing that you blow, but it's like a baby synthesizer.

FZ: Ladies and gentlemen, I will now play a rhythm guitar solo.

FZ: And now, ladies and gentlemen, a drum solo performed for you by Terry "Bow Tie" Bozzio. Take it away, Terry.

You've been listening to the golden tones of Napo-- Napoleon Murphy Brock on tenor sax and lead vocals, André Lewis on keyboards and thing that he blows in the middle of the show, Norma Bell alto sax and etceteras, little skinny Terry "Ted" Bozzio on drums, Roy Ralph "Moleman Managuito de la Banana Republic" Estrada on bass, and yours truly, Tyrone Power on guitar. Thank you very much for coming to the concert, hope you enjoyed it, and good night.

• Dalszövegek

(Zappa)

2008. 6. 13

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Albumok

Solos from Cosmik Debris
Probably:
Palais des Sports, Paris, France
September 26, 1974

FZ--guitar
Napoleon Murphy Brock--vocals, saxophone
George Duke--keyboards, vocals
Ruth Underwood--percussion
Tom Fowler--bass
Chester Thompson--drums


George: Ah, look, you know they tried to tell me
Napoleon: Whoa, get me out of gay Paris, oh yeah
George: Lord, that broad in the bathtub was a man
Napoleon: What did you say?
George: Oh, lord, don't you know he tried to tell me
Napoleon: Did you see that string around her back, George?
George: Lord, that that broad in the bathtub was a man
Napoleon: Oh, you know you gotta look so you'll understand ya'll
George: Well, did you know the source I heard from was fairly reliable? Whoa, don't you know that [...] be jivin' sometimes [...] I told that fool, I said listen that, that was a man [...] jive around the big lips on them. I said that's got to be a lady.
Napoleon: You better, you better
George: Look out!

Capitol Theatre, Passaic, New Jersey
November 8, 1974 (late show)
+
Unknown studio & date

FZ--guitar
George Duke--keyboards
Chester Thompson--drums


George?: Ha ha ha!
FZ: I hope you're recording this.

Royce Hall, UCLA
September 18, 1975

The Abnuceals Emuukha Electric Orchestra

DAR Constitution Hall, Washington, DC
November 11, 1972 (early show)

FZ--conductor, guitar
Tony Duran--slide guitar
Malcolm McNab--trumpet
Gary Barone--trumpet (solo)
Tom Malone--trumpet, trombone, tuba, piccolo, saxophone
Bruce Fowler--trombone
Glenn Ferris--trombone
Earle Dumler--oboe, saxophone, sarrusophone
Dave Parlato--bass
Jim Gordon--drums, steel drums

Thank you.

That turned out pretty good.

Guitar solo from Inca Roads
Rhein-Neckarhalle, Eppelheim, Germany
March 21, 1979

FZ--guitar solo
Warren Cuccurullo--guitar
Denny Walley--guitar, bg vocal
Ike Willis--bg vocal
Tommy Mars--keyboards
Peter Wolf--keyboards
Ed Mann--percussion
Arthur Barrow--bass
Vinnie Colaiuta--drums

Guitar solo from Yo' Mama
Rhein-Neckar Stadion, Eppelheim, Germany
February 24, 1978

FZ--guitar solo
Adrian Belew--guitar
Tommy Mars--keyboards
Peter Wolf--keyboards
Ed Mann--percussion
Patrick O'Hearn--bass
Terry Bozzio--drums

The Palladium, NYC
October 31, 1981 (late show)

FZ--guitar, vocals
Ray White--vocals, guitar
Steve Vai--guitar
Tommy Mars--keyboards
Robert Martin--keyboards, vocals
Ed Mann--percussion
Scott Thunes--bass
Chad Wackerman--drums

The Illinois Enema Bandit
I heard he's on the loose
I heard he's on the loose
Lord, the pitiful screams
Of all them college-educated women . . .
He'd just be tyin' 'em up
(They'd be all bound down!)
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

The Illinois Enema Bandit
I heard it on the news
I heard it on the news
Bloomington Illinois . . . he has caused some alarm
Just sneakin' around there
From farm to farm
He's got a rubberized bag
And a hose on his arm
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump
Lookin' for some rustic co-ed rump
That he just might wanna pump

The Illinois Enema Bandit
One day he'll have to pay
Some day he'll have to pay
The police will say, "You're under arrest!"
And then the judge would have him for a special guest
And then the D.A. will order a secret test
Stuff his pudgy little thumbs in the side of his vest
Then they'll put out a call for the jury folks
And then the judge would say, "No poo-poo jokes!"
They'll drag in the bandit for all to see,
Sayin' "Don't nobody have no sympathy . . .
HOT SOAPY WATER in the THIRD DEGREE!"
And the Bandit might say . . . (Ha ha!)

DID YOU CAUSE (What is it, Ray?) THIS MISERY?
(You see a good one down there?)
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
WELL DID YOU CAUSE THIS MISERY?
Well, one girl shout: "Let the Bandit be!"

BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?
TELL ME, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS?
Another girl shout: "Let the fiend go free!"

BANDIT ARE YOU GUILTY?
TELL ME, DID YOU DO THESE DEEDS?
You know what he said?
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
(I believe that)
"It must be just what they all need . . . "

He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice
He just be pumpin' every one of 'em up with all the bag fulla
"It must be just what they all need . . . "
The Illinois Enema Bandit Juice

The Illinois
The Illinois
Ain't talkin' 'bout Fontana
Ain't talkin' 'bout Potato Headed Bobby
Talkin' 'bout the Illinois
Illinois
Enema Bandit
Juice

FZ: Alright!

includes Don't Eat The Yellow Snow, Nanook Rubs It, St Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast, Mar-Juh-Rene and a quote from Midnight Sun (Hampton/Burke/Mercer)

Hordern Pavilion, Sydney, Australia
June 25, 1973

FZ--guitar, vocals
Sal Marquez--trumpet, vocals
Jean-Luc Ponty--violin
George Duke--keyboards, vocals
Ian Underwood--woodwinds, synthesizer
Ruth Underwood--percussion
Bruce Fowler--trombone
Tom Fowler--bass
Ralph Humphrey--drums

No, no, don't eat it
No, no, don't eat it
No, no, don't eat it
No, no, don't eat it

Dreamed I was an Eskimo
Frozen wind began to blow
Under my boots 'n around my toe
Frost had bit the ground below
Was a hundred degrees below zero
And my momma cried:
Nanook! Nanook!
Nanook! Nanook!
Nanook! No no
Save your money: don't go to the show
And I turned around an' I said:
HO HO
An' the Northern Lites commenced t' glow
An' she looked at me with a tear in her eye
And she said:
WATCH OUT WHERE THE HUSKIES GO
AN' DON'T YOU EAT THAT YELLOW SNOW
WATCH OUT WHERE THE HUSKIES GO
AN' DON'T YOU EAT THAT YELLOW SNOW

Well right about that time, people,
A fur trapper
Who was strictly from commercial
(Strictly Commershil)
Had the unmedicated audacity to jump up from behind my igyaloo
(Peek-a-Boo Woo-ooo-ooo)
And he started in to whippin' on my fav'rite baby seal
With a lead-filled snow shoe . . .
I said:
With a lead
LEAD
Filled
LEAD-FILLED
With a lead-filled snow shoe
SNOW SHOE
Peak-a-boo
PEEK-A-BOO
With a lead
LEAD
With a lead-filled
LEAD-FILLED
With a lead-filled snow shoe
SNOW SHOE
And he said Peak-a-boo.
PEEK-A-BOO
He jumped up from behind my igyaloo
And he said Peak-a-boo
With a lead-filled snow shoe
Right on
Right upside the head of my favorite baby seal
He said Peak-a-boo
With a lead-filled snow shoe
Hit him on the nose and hit him on the fin
You know that got me just about as evil
As an Eskimo boy can be . . .

Got me evil as an Eskimo boy can be
So I reached down with my patented Nanook of the North whale blubber mitten
And I scooped down 'n I reached down 'n I bent down
An' I gathered up a generous mitten full of the deadly . . .
YELLOW SNOW
The deadly Yellow Snow from right there where the huskies go
And then, in a fit of anger
I pounced
And I pounced again
I jumped up 'n down on the chest of the . . .
I injured the fur trapper
And then I took my mitten with
The deadly Yellow Snow Crystals
And I proceeded to rub it all into his beady little eyes
With a vigorous circular motion
Hitherto unknown to Sydney
But destined to take the place of THE MUD SHARK
In your mythology
Here it is, hey!

Really cheap, isn't it?
God damn , that's cheap
That's so cheap we're gonna do it again . . .
That's enough. Okay.

Well, by that time
The extract of the Northern dog
Had induced in the fur trapper
A terrible case of temporary
Snow blindness
And he turned around
And he said:
I CAN'T SEE
(I CAN'T SEE . . . TEMPORARILY)
I CAN'T SEE
(I CAN'T SEE . . . TEMPORARILY)
WHAT IF THERE'S SOMETHING GOOD ON TV
(I . . . I CAN'T SEE . . . TEMPORARILY)
AND I CAN'T SEE
(I . . . I CAN'T SEE . . . TEMPORARILY)
He took a dog . . . a dog-doo sno-cone
An' stuffed it in my right eye
An' he took a dog-doo sno-cone
An' stuffed it in my other eye
An' the huskie wee-wee,
I mean the doggie wee-wee
Has blinded me
Temporarily
And, oh, lord, I can't see
Well here we have a deflicted fur trapper, folks
Wandering around in the middle of the
Desolate Northern wasteland
Can't tell where he's going
And he wants to get home in time to watch something good on TV
Well, he doesn't know it but he's got a lot of time
But he . . . maybe there's something that he likes
He has to fix up his eyes before he can watch the television so
Scratches underneath of his parka
Tries to figure out what he's gonna do
And remembers an ancient Eskimo legend
Where it is, it is written
On the little things that they write it on, whatever they are
That if anything bad ever happens to your eyes
As the result of physical combat
With anybody named Nanook
And if therefore
He rubs some dog doo crystals in your eye
And you have problems
(It actually says this, folks!)
That the only way that you can fix it up
Is you gotta go trudgin' across the tundra . . .
Mile after mile
All the way down to the
Columbia River delta
It's really funky down there, I'm tellin' ya
And he's gotta go down to find
The parish of Saint Alfonzo
Saint Alfonzo was the patron saint of
The smelt fishermen of Portuguese extraction
And he's gotta bust into the pantry
At Saint Alfonzo's parish
And he's got to locate
A mysterious elixir
Disguised as a box of mar-juh-rene
And his instructions are
To rub it on his deflicted eyes
Until some sort of miraculous cure will take place
In the next episode
We follow the fur trapper as he trudges across the tundra
Direct to Saint Alfonzo's parish
And it goes something like this . . .
Hoopla!

Well, here we are
At Saint Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
Where I stole the mar-juh-rene
An' widdled on the Bingo Cards in lieu of the latrine
I saw a handsome parish lady
Make her entrance like a queen
Why she was totally chenille
And her old man was a Marine
As she abused a sausage pattie
And said why don't you treat me mean?
Hurt me (hurt me!), hurt me (hurt me!), hurt me, oooooh!
At Saint Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
(Hah! Good God! Get off the bus!)
Where I sto-o-ole . . .
Where I sto-ole . . .
Where I sto-o-o-wo-wo-wole . . .
Woo woo woo . . .
The mar-juh-rene

Yeah, I made it down to Saint Alfonzo's parish, I did
Made it into the pantry down there
I finally discovered what I was looking for
I groped my way past the peas, and
I groped my way past the asparagus
And I groped my way past the cauliflower
Groped my way and I groped my way
I don't mind groping my way
And I groped my way and I found the mar-juh-rene
There it was, there was a little left over from the pancake breakfast
Reached in
Pulled out a lump of the stuff
Then I rubbed it on my right hand eye
And I took it and I
Rubbed it on my left hand eye
Started feeling a little bit better
And I contemplated on the mystery and the majesty of the mar-juh-rene
I said to myself the 'M' . . .
The 'M' of mar-juh-rene
Must under these circumstances
Symbolize
'Marsupial'
And the 'A' under these circumstances
Must symbolize
The constellation of Andromeda
And the 'R'
Under these circumstances
Must constitute--
'Ridiculous'
Which is what these circumstances actually are!
Then there's a hyphen
'M-A-R'
Don't lose the continuity, folks, there's a
'M-A-R,' hyphen
And as I said last night
And I'll say it again because I liked it
The first hyphen in mar-juh-rene
Could be used for erotic gratification
By a very desperate stenographer
'M-A-R,' hyphen, 'J' . . .
'J' . . .
Wha-- What's a 'J' tonight, uh . . .
'J' is for Jesus, and we all know he loves you, ha ha ha ha . . .
Well, some of you people will go for that and some of you won't
What's the difference?
Just thought I'd throw it in. Then there's a 'U'
That 'U' is for everybody who believes what the 'J' stood for
And also we have a subordinate 'U' for the rest of you who go, "Huh?"
And then there's an 'H' which stands for
Or used to about two years ago, stand for 'homunculus'
And then there's another hyphen
'M-A-R,' hyphen, 'J-U-H,' hyphen
The second hyphen tonight, ladies and gentlemen
Could be used
Could be used . . .
Ha ha ha . . .
It could be used on you if you bent right over
And then--if you were very short, of course
And sensitive
'M-A-R,' hyphen, 'J-U-H,' hyphen, 'R'
There's another 'R'
This 'R' will stand for
'Rebus,' which is a puzzle with pictures in it
Then there's an 'E'
It's a very long obnoxious 'E' to the nth degree
And then there's an 'N'
Which is the 'N' of the 'E' with the nth degree
And then there's a tiny weeny dwindling-off little 'E' on the end of the thing
By the time I'd finished spelling mar-juh-rene
Correctly, including two hyphens
My eyes felt a lot better and I was ready for the next part of the song

Royce Hall, UCLA
September 18, 1975

The Abnuceals Emuukha Electric Orchestra

• Dalszövegek

(Zappa)

2007. 10. 31

<< Előző | Következő >>
Albumok

5. "Ulterior Motive" - 3:19^<>

Thank you. How's the sound balance out there? Is it too loud? No? How many say yes? Okay. More Ruth?

Okay. What we'd like to do right now is another arranged piece. This is called-- Wanna do "Greggery Peccary"?

This is-- Wait a minute. This is called "The Adventures Of Greggery Peccary." Now we're gonna try a new version of "Greggery Peccary" tonight. We're gonna put some solos in between the movements of "Greggery Peccary." What I'd like to do is play one-- the first section, and then cut off and then go to the front row here and play all in sixteenth notes at a tempo that I start up. [...]

And then on cue you'll hit the second movement. And after the second movement, instead of going directly into the third, we'll do all the brass section, same thing: sixteenth notes very staccato.

At the end of the third movement, into the third movement, we're gonna go to the back row winds and percussion, same thing, sixteenth notes staccato. And then change over to "Brown Clouds." And we'll put "Brown Clouds" at the end of it.

We have to get this organized so that it doesn't sleaze off before your very ears. There's a-- There is an ulterior motive for making sure that it doesn't sleaze too much, because we're recording this show.

[...]

Maybe in between these movements I'll tell you what the story of "Greggery Peccary" is. But we'll just start it up. You can just imagine what's going on.

One
One two three four

• Dalszövegek

(Zappa)

2007. 8. 24

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Albumok

George: What the?

Heh heh heh

George: [...] told him [...] wasn't gonna do him no good, but he kept insisting.

Heh heh heh

Heh heh heh

George: See that broad over there?
Napoleon: I don't--
George: She said--
Napoleon: All she had to--

George: All she had to do was--
Napoleon: She doesn't--

Heh heh heh

Napoleon: If I had my choice--
George: But, like, she wouldn't--

Heh heh heh

Napoleon: [...] Wait a minute!

Heh heh heh

Napoleon: I told ya [...]
George: But--
Napoleon: Listen here. I went up there the other day--

George: Heh heh heh

Napoleon: [...] everybody [...] Carrots are not gonna be served until they bring-- Somebody
George: I said, "Get down, Ruth!"

Heh heh heh

Napoleon: Ladies and gentlemen! Right now we'd like to introduce to you, all the way from Transylvania, by way of Cucamonga, California, came here in a Herbie-mobile, driven by Marty-marty-poo, ladies and gentlemen, I do present to you, right over here, in his brand new Sears and Roebuck's tweed, ladies and gentlemen, let's get together now and have a nice round of applause for Mr. Frank Zappa!

His name is Stevie Vai,
And he's a crazy guy
Last November, I recall,
He needed a spanking

He decided then
A female specimen
Would be exciting for a night
To give him a spanking

Laurel was her name
She came to Notre Dame
He told me just the other day
He oughta be thanking
Her for the spanking

She was large and soft
And she beat him off
Made him drool upon his dork
And gave it a wanking
After the spanking

Hair brush!
Oh! What a hair brush!
(It's not that he requires grooming!
Guys with light blue hair never do!)

Then she did exclaim:
"There's another game
That we can play with this device,
And then a banana!"

It was slightly green
Vapors in between
Rising up to fill the room
And cook the banana

She said it was dry
"Stevie won't you try
To drool a little drool on it
And grease the banana"

Later in the dawn,
Laurel carried on
She got right up and dressed herself and
Ate the banana

(Well . . . )
Ahem. In the dark
Where all the fevers grow
Under the water (Yeah . . . )
Where the shark bubbles blow
In the mornin' (Mornin' . . .) (Well . . .)
By yer radio
Do the walls close in t' suffocate ya
You ain't got no friends . . .
An' all the others: they hate ya
Does the life you been livin' gotta go? Hmm?
Well, lemme straighten you out
About a place I know . . .
(Get yer shoes 'n socks on people,
It's right aroun' the corner,
Over by Tom Waits restaurant)
Out through the night
An' the whispering breezes
To the place where they keep
The Imaginary Diseases,
Out through the night
An' the whispering breezes
To the place where they keep
The Imaginary Diseases . . .

Now, ladies and gentlemen,
Scientists call this disease
Bromidrosis
But us regular folks
Who might wear tennis shoes
Or an occasional python boot
Know this exquisite little inconvenience
By the name of
(Now watch this):
STINK FOOT
(Yes, indeed.)
Y'know, my python boot is too tight
I couldn't get it off last night
A week went by, an' now it's July
I finally got it off
An' my girl-friend cry,
She said: "STINK FOOT!
STINK FOOT, darlin'
Your STINK FOOT puts the hurts on my nose!
STINK FOOT! STINK FOOT! I ain't lyin',
Can you rinse it off, d'you suppose?"
Here Fido . . . Here Fido . . .
Bring the slippers, little puppy . . .
That's a good dog!
"Arf, arf, arf!"
Sick . . .

FZ: Oh, that's enough of that!

This girl is easy meat
I seen her on the street
See-through blouse an' a tiny little dress
Her manner indiscreet . . . I knew she was
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

She wanna take me home
Make me sweat and moan
Rub my head and beat me off
With a copy of Rollin' Stone . . . I knew she was
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

I told her I was late
I had another date
I can't get off on the Rollin' Stone
But the robots think it's great . . . I knew she was
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy,
Easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

Easy
She's so easy
Easy
I saw her tiny titties
Through her see-through blouse
Just had to take the girl to my house
Easy
Meat

I might be movin' to Montana soon
Just to raise me up a crop of
Dental Floss

Raisin' it up
Waxen it down
In a little white box
That I can sell uptown

But by myself I wouldn't
Have no boss,
'Cause I'd be raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss

Raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss
Raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss

Well I just might grow me some bees
But I'd leave the sweet stuff
To somebody else (how 'bout you, right over there?) and then I would

Keep the wax
'N melt it down
Pluck the Floss
'N swish it aroun'

And I would have me a crop
Poo-poo ta-na-nah
And poo-poo ta-na-nah

Movin' to Montana soon
Gonna be a Dental Floss tycoon
(Woppy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon (well)
Gonna be a mennil-toss flykune
(I wonder what that means . . . )

I'm pluckin' the ol'
Dennil Floss
That's growin' on the prairie
Pluckin' the floss!
I plucked all day an' all nite an' all
Afternoon . . .

Oh, I'm ridin' a small tiny hoss
(His name is MIGHTY LITTLE)
He's a good hoss
Even though
He's a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or
Blanket on anyway
He's a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or
Blanket on anyway
Well, any way

I'm pluckin' the ol'
Dennil Floss
Even if you think it is a little silly, folks
I don't care if you think it's silly, folks
I don't care if you think it's silly, folks

I'm gonna find me a horse
Just about this big,
An' ride him all along the border line

With a
Pair of heavy-duty
Zircon-encrusted tweezers in my hand
Every other wrangler would say
I was mighty grand

But by myself I wouldn't
Have no boss,
'Cause I'd be raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss

Raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss
(Yes it is!)
Raisin' my lonely
Dental Floss

Well I might
Ride along the border
With my tweezers gleamin'
In the moon-lighty night
(Help me out, Ruth! Tweezer glint . . . )

And then I'd
Get a cuppa cawfee
'N give my foot a push . . .
Just me 'n the pygmy pony
Over by the Dennil Floss Bush

'N then I might just
Jump back on
An' ride
Like a cowboy
Into the dawn to Montana

Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Why don't you sharpen it then?)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yes indeed)
Movin' to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin' to Montana soon

Did a vehicle
Come from somewhere out there
Just to land in the Andes?
Was it round
And did it have
A motor
Or was it
Something
Different

George: Sure was different. I ain't never seen nothing like that in my entire life!
Napoleon: Whose python boot is that? That ain't my sh-- What?
FZ: Why don't you sharpen it then?

George: Little round ball . . . I could . . . couldn't . . . That white cain't do nothin'
Napoleon: Je-he-zus! Wait a minute!
FZ: Mother Mary and Jozuf!

Did a vehicle
Did a vehicle
Did a vehicle
Fly along the mountains
And find a place to park itself
Park it
Se-e-e-elf
(PARK IT . . . PARK IT)

Or did someone
Build a place
To leave a space
For such a thing to land

Did a vehicle
Come from somewhere out there
Did a vehicle come
From somewhere out there
Did the Indians, first on the bill
Carve up the hill

Did a booger-bear
Come from somewhere out there
Just to land on Perellis?
Was she round
And did she have a motor
Or was she something different

Guacamole Queen
Guacamole Queen
Guacamole Queen

At the Armadillo in Austin Texas, her aura,
Or did someone build a place
Or leave a space for Chester's Thing to land
(Chester's Thing . . . on Ruth)
Did a booger-bear
Come from somewhere out there
Did a booger-bear
Come from somewhere out there
Did the Indians, first on the bill
Carve up her hill
On Ruth
On Ruth
That's Ruth

9. Room Service - 9:15^<>

One, two, three, four . . .

Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom ([...])
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom (Nearly a year ago)
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom (Wash your hands on the)
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom (Everybody go)
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom (Everybody go)
Doo-doo roo-ooh-oom

FZ: Hello? Is this room service?
Napoleon: Room service! This is not only room service, this is your automatic and responsible doo-doo room service.
FZ: Good God, ain't it funky now? Look here, you know, do you realize how heavy these telephones are that we're holding?
Napoleon: Ah, do I realize!
FZ: I'll make a deal with ya, I'll put mine down if you put yours down.
George: . . .
Napoleon: What would you like? What would you like? We got anything, what would you like?
FZ: You're sure that this is doo-doo room service, right?
Napoleon: This is doo-doo room service.
FZ: Alright.
Napoleon: Not just do-do room service, doo-doo room service.
FZ: Alright. I want you to understand one thing.
Napoleon: Go ahead.
FZ: You're talking to a hungry guy.
Napoleon: All you musicians are hungry, go on . . .
FZ: That's right. And so many of them eat.
Napoleon: There you go . . .
FZ: And there are the ones who don't eat, but, ladies and gentlemen, just focus on this one fact: I'm pretending to call room service right now at an imaginary hotel that we can't name because they don't sponsor our program, but there's still hope for them.
Napoleon: Humble, humble people . . .
FZ: However, ladies and gentlemen, just, just pretend that he's working in the kitchen and I'm up in my lonely little rock'n'roll musician's room . . .
Napoleon: Stop burning those beans!
FZ: Ha ha ha . . . stop burning those beans?
Napoleon: I'm in the kitchen, you know, gotta control . . .
FZ: Why don't you sharpen it then?
Napoleon: Gotta control these pilgrims in the kitchen . . .
FZ: Okay.
Napoleon: . . . you know, they'll burn the beans.
FZ: Hello, is this room service? Look, I'm so hungry. I'm so hungry . . .
Napoleon: What would you like?
FZ: I want to eat.
Napoleon: Anything you want to eat, you can get it here.
FZ: I want a green hocker.
Napoleon: Let me write this down, one . . . green hocker.
FZ: In a Greyhound locker.
Napoleon: In a Greyhound locker. You musicians sure have some strange requests!
FZ: Yeah, well . . .
Napoleon: But doo-doo room service is here to please, go on.
FZ: That's right. I want a green hocker in a Greyhound locker . . .
Napoleon: One green hocker in a Greyhound locker . . .
FZ: Smokin'!
Napoleon: Smokin'!
FZ: In the Pygmy Twylyte . . . You do aim to please, don't you?
Napoleon: We're burnin' that sucker up!
FZ: Ha ha ha . . . we's burnin' that sucker up! Listen to that!
Napoleon: . . .
FZ: How you do go on?
Napoleon: Let me tell you. Is that all you want? You sure you don't want no meat?
FZ: No, no, listen . . .
Napoleon: Don't you want some meat?
FZ: Ha ha ha . . . No, I got some meat.
Napoleon: Wait a minute!
FZ: Here's the deal. No, no . . .
Napoleon: You shouldn't talk about our room service unless you taste it first. You gotta taste it first.
FZ: Oh, well, I'm, I'm very anxious to taste it, however I'm not finished givin' you my order. Okay?
Napoleon: Okay. What else would you like?
FZ: I want you to concentrate. Just let your mind drift back to the first part of the order, it's a green hocker in a Greyhound locker smokin' in the Pygmy Twylyte, and I want, I want to avoid the Garni Du Jour, I never eat the Garni Du Jour . . .
Napoleon: You don't?
FZ: No . . .
Napoleon: What about the dogs?
FZ: Now, listen.
Napoleon: You gotta eat.
FZ: I haven't told you about the dogs yet.
Napoleon: I saw you when you registered, don't tell me . . . the dogs . . . oh, those were two boogers and one dog, I'm sorry.
FZ: The dog did not register with me.
Napoleon: Oh, okay.
FZ: There's only one person the dogs register with.
Napoleon: I knew they were with your troop but I didn't know which one.
FZ: And he used to have a suit on, gorilla hair on it. Now look. I want to avoid the wrinkled carrot.
Napoleon: Okay, no thin, wrinkled carrot.
FZ: No thin, wrinkled carrot, no celery, no . . .
Napoleon: No twisted celery . . .
FZ: No parsley.
Napoleon: No parsley.
FZ: No salad that's so soaky that you don't want to get in near it.
Napoleon: No salad with Saran Wrap on top of it . . .
FZ: No. I don't want any styrofoam cups.
Napoleon: . . . to keep the flies . . . No styrofoam cups . . .
FZ: I don't want any styrofoam knives and forks.
Napoleon: No paper plate.
FZ: No, no paper plates.
Napoleon: Man, we gonna serve you on China, this jive gonna be on genuine China.
FZ: I must have come to the right hotel this time.
Napoleon: Doo-doo room service. Anything you need, we're here to please.
FZ: During the last, during the last show the room service wasn't quite this good, but I know that I'm really gonna get it this time. Now, look . . .
Napoleon: Well, we try hard-- We do try harder, you know.
FZ: Along with the green hocker in the Greyhound locker smokin' in the Pygmy Twylyte, I would like to have a crystal eye . . .
Napoleon: One crystal eye.
FZ: A crystal eye (that's two crystal eyes) . . .
Napoleon: One more crystal eye.
FZ: That's right. And a crystal kidney.
Napoleon: And one crystal kidney. You know that's just about like liver, you know, but shinin' though.
FZ: Yeah.
Napoleon: Yeah, you know. So if you want it . . .
FZ: Yeah, I want it!
Napoleon: Alright, whenever you want us to bring it . . .
FZ: Sure I want it. I don't want you to be burnin' that sucker up, though.
Napoleon: Wait a minute. You said you wanted to smoke it . . .
FZ: No, not the kidney.
Napoleon: Oh, okay.
FZ: Now, okay, I want you send this to room 3-3.
Napoleon: Room 3-3. That's right after f-four. 4-4.
FZ: No. 4-4 is somebody else.
Napoleon: Ah, okay. 3-3.
FZ: That's Chester's room.
Napoleon: Ha ha . . . I must be in 4-5, then, and Duke must be in 4-3. Ha ha ha!
FZ: Ha ha ha!
Napoleon: The way Marty registers all the Orientals in this group . . . Here we go . . .
FZ: Look . . . Yeah, would you be able to recognize me, I'm in room 3-3, and I'll be right next to room 3-4.
Napoleon: Alright!
FZ: And 3-4 is the room that's got that smell of a dog coming out of it.
Napoleon: Well, I know, you won't miss that.
FZ: Okay.
Napoleon: The person I'm sending up is familiar with that odor.
FZ: You know . . . ha ha, why? Because he's from Baltimore?
Napoleon: NO! Because he has a little beard and his office is in the Motown building and on and on and on, well, you know.
FZ: You're trying to tell me that this guy is so swift that my order is gonna get up there right away?
Napoleon: They call him Slick for short.
FZ: Slick for short?
Napoleon: When he don't have shorts, they still call him Slick.
FZ: Okay, well, I want you to send him up, because I sure am hungry.
Napoleon: Listen here, matter of fact, sure you won't get the wrong guy, I'm gonna tell who we gonna be sendin' up, you know we're gonna send up to you with your fabulous order up to your room . . .

Zach, Zach, Zach Glickman
(Drivin' a little bitty car)
Zach, Zach, Zach Glickman
( . . . for your own good)
Zach, Zach, Zach Glickman
(The kind of guy you'd call a friend)
Zach, Zach, Zach Glickman
('cause I'm . . . )

FZ: Hello, room service?
Napoleon: Yes?
FZ: Look here, I want you to dummy up, because my food ain't got here yet, you know?
Napoleon: Is this room 3-3?
FZ: It's room 3-3, you know, next to three . . .
Napoleon: Your food didn't get there?
FZ: No, it never got here. That guy from Baltimore that you sent up just didn't make it, you know?
Napoleon: It's a case of bad judgement, I'll try better this time.
FZ: Yeah, ha ha . . . Listen, I'm gonna get very angry with you. I'm gonna, I'm going to call Herb if the food doesn't come right away.
Napoleon: Hey, ah . . . yeah, as a matter of fact, I tell you what we can do, ha ha . . . so we make sure your food does get there, and so you don't get any advances, and for that matter, so you don't get too much food for the price you're paying. You know who we're gonna send the food up by?
FZ: No, who you're gonna send the food up by?
Napoleon: We're gonna send the food up by the one and only . . . this cat, Herb!

Cohen
Herb, Herb, Herb Cohen
Herb, Herb, Herb Cohen
Herb, Herb, Herb Cohen
(What you gonna do?)

FZ: You know the food finally got here and uh . . .
Napoleon: Alright. I knew I can depend on him, you know . . . he's got it down to the . . . hundredths of a second.
FZ: Yeah, I know, Herb does have it down to the hundredths of a second. Well, you know, I think we've exhausted the possibilities of this routine, do you suggest we end the song?
Napoleon: Either that or get Mort up here to dance, I mean, you know . . .
FZ: Oh, wait a minute. Mort, come here. Mort, come on.
Napoleon: Come on, come on, Mort.
FZ: Now, look, you can fill out the AFTRA contract later . . . Ladies and gentlemen, I want to introduce you to, this is Mort Libov. Mort Libov, de la Baltimore, is the producer of the show, and he would like to sing to you right now . . .
Napoleon: Yeah! Ha ha ha ha ha! Well . . . well . . .
George: Well . . . well . . .
FZ: Good God, ain't it funky now! I'll tell you what, hey, I'll make it easy.
Napoleon: Gimme that wine, oh, gimme that wine, gimme that . . .
FZ: We're gonna make it easy on you, Mort. All you have to do is sing your own name on the off beat, you're ready?
Mort: You're gonna do it with me?

Mort, Mort, Mort Libov
Mort, Mort, Mort Libov
Mort, Mort, Mort Libov
Mort, Mort, Mort Libov

Napoleon: Hire him! Hire him!
FZ: An instant superstar!
Napoleon: Put that sucker in the band! Put that sucker in the band!
FZ: If this show ever goes on television, and if this show ever galls . . . if it ever galls to Arbutus, if it ever goes to Baltimore, if it ever goes to Havre de Grace, all those fine places, I want all the people in that WRETCHED state of Maryland to understand one thing: Mort's from there, Marty's from there, Zack is from there, Chester's from there, and I'm from there too.

FZ: Thank you!

The Mystery Man came over
An' he said: "I'm outa-site!"
He said, for a nominal service charge,
I could reach nervonna t'nite
If I was ready, willing 'n able
To pay him his regular fee
Why, he would drop all the rest of his pressing affairs
And devote His Attention to me
But I said . . .
Look here brother,
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Well . . . ) (Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris? Why don't you sharpen it then?)
Look here brother,
Don't you waste your time on . . .

The Mystery Man got nervous
An' he fidget around a bit
He reached in the pocket of his Mystery Robe
An' he whipped out a shaving kit
Now, I thought it was a razor
An' a can of foamin' goo
But he told me right then when the top popped open
There was nothin' his box won't do
With the oil of Afro-dytee (Well . . . )
An' the dust of the Grand Wazoo
He said:
"You might not believe this, Mort, but it'll cure your crab cakes too!"
An' I said hey . . .
Hey, look here Morty,
(Morty?)
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Yes, indeed, who are you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?)
Look here brother,
Don't you waste your time on . . .

Go man, go . . .

George: Well . . .
Napoleon: Well . . .
FZ: Well . . . Hratche-plche, hratche . . . Well . . .
Napoleon: Crab.
George: Well . . .

I've got troubles of my own, I said
An' you can't help me out
So take your meditations an' your preparations
An' ram it up yer . . .
"BUT I GOT A KRISTL BOL!," he said
An' he held it on up to the light
So I snatched it
All away from him
An' I showed him how to do it right
(Yes, let's boogie!)
I wrapped a newspaper 'round my head
So I'd look like I was Deep
I said some Mumbo Jumbos then
An' told him he was goin' to sleep
I robbed his rings
An' pocket watch
An' everything else I found, yeah!
I had that sucker hypnotized
He couldn't even make a sound
I proceeded to tell him his future then
As long as he was hanging around,
I said
"The price of meat has just gone . . .
An' yer ol' lady has just gone . . . "
Look here brother,
(Look here brother)
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Now is that a real poncho or is that a Sears poncho?
Or is it Bob Duffy's pants?)
Don't you know,
You could make more money as a butcher,
So don't you waste your waste on me

Ah-oh-oh-oh ah-oh-oh-oh ah-oh-oh-oh oh-oh

La-la la-la la-la la-la
Ba-la ba-la na-la

She was the daughter of a wealthy
Florentine Pogen
Read 'em 'n weep
Was her adjustable slogan

She was a debutante daisy
With a color-note organ
Deep in the street
She drove a '59 Morgan

WOO-LAH!

That's the kinda step she takes
When her hot breaks hot brakes
That's the kinda sound she makes
(ooh, let go uh me)
When her crab cakes

She didn't like it when her fan belt
Shrunk & got shorter
(Ointment)
Battery leaks could nearly cost her a quarter

She didn't want to go home
An' watch the pestle go mortar
Later she speaks
On how Perellis might court her

Marty's dog, na-na-hoo
Na-na-na, noo-na-hoo
Na-na-na, na-na-na!
Na-na-na, na-na-hoo

She was the daughter
Ah-ah-ahhh
Of a wealthy
Florentine Pogen
Po-oh-wo-oh-oh
Po-oh-wo-oh-oh
Po-oh-wo-oh-oh
Ga-ya-ee-annnn

Read 'em 'n weep
Read 'em 'n weep
(Take a booger home with you to)
Read 'em 'n weep

Ay-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay
Ah-ooh-ah-ooh-ah-ooh-ah-HAH
Ah-ooh-ah-ooh-ah-ooh-ah-HAH

Chester's go-rilla
She go oink
Chester's go-rilla
She go quack
Chester's go-rilla
She go moo
Chester's go-rilla
She go
Hratche-plche
Hratche-plche

FZ: Thank you. Chester's Gorilla was played by Marty Perellis.

• Dalszövegek

(Zappa)

2007. 4. 1

<< Előző | Következő >>
Albumok

FZ: Hi! Welcome to the show tonight, ladies and gentlemen. Hope you're in the mood for a good time. You'd better be. Let me introduce you to everybody. Ike Willis on guitar and vocals. Tommy Mars on keyboards and vocals. Steve Vai on guitar and vocals. Vinnie Colaiuta on drums, vitamin pills and rhythmic encyclopedia. Arthur Barrow on bass and vocals. Bob Harris on keyboards, trumpet and tiny weeny little high vocals. Ray White on guitar and vocals. Not bad! This guy is wearing a shirt that says, "Lick me, my 10th Zappa concert." Alright. Well I'm not going to lick you but maybe she will. Go on, lick him. No, a little lower, a little lower. Go for it. It's the real world. And I know that you're all intimately acquainted with the real world, otherwise you wouldn't be here, so . . . let's get on with it. Listen-- Oh! "Fuck the draft!" Of course, turn it around and put the spotlight on that sign. Stand up and show it to the rest of the audience. Can we get the spotlight down there? My sentiments exactly. Ah, no, thanks. Okay, you're ready?

2. You Are What You Is - 4:12^<>

One, two . . .

Do you know what you are?
You are what you is
You is what you am
(A cow don't make ham . . . )
You ain't what you're not
So see what you got
You are what you is
An' that's all it 'tis

A foolish young man
From a middle class fam'ly
Started singin' the blues
'Cause he thought it was manly
Now he talks like the Kingfish
("Saffiiiee!")
From Amos 'n Andy
("Holy mack'l dere!")
He tells you that chitlins . . .
(Chitlins!)
Well, they taste just like candy
He thinks that he's got
De whole thang down
From the Nivea Lotion
To de Royal Crown

Do you know what you are?
You are what you is
You is what you am
(A cow don't make ham . . . )
You ain't what you're not
So see what you got
You are what you is
An' that's all it 'tis

A foolish young man
Of the Negro Persuasion
Devoted his life
To become a caucasian
He stopped eating pork
He stopped eating greens
He traded his dashiki
("Uhuru!")
For some Jordache Jeans
He learned to play golf
An' he got a good score
Now he says to himself
"I AIN'T NO NIGGER NO MORE . . . HEY! UH! HEY!"

Do you know what you are?
You are what you is
You is what you am
(A cow don't make ham . . . )
You ain't what you're not
So see what you got
You are what you is
An' that's all it 'tis

Who is who
'N what is what
'N why is this
Appropriot
If you don't like
What you has got
Drop it in the dirt
'N let it rot
Someone else
Will surely come
'N pick it up
'Cause he wants some
And when one day
You wonder who
You used to was
'N what you do
You'll scratch your head
'N look around
But what you lost
Will not be found

Do you know what you are?
You are what you is
You is what you am
A cow don't make a ham
You ain't what you're not
So see what you got
You are what you is
An' that's all it is
YOU ARE WHAT YOU IS
(Aaa-aah)
AND THAT'S ALL IT IS
(Ooo-ooh)
YOU ARE WHAT YOU IS
(Aaa-aah)
AN THAT'S ALL IT IS
(Ooo-ooh)
YOU ARE WHAT YOU IS
(Aaa-aah)
AN THAT'S ALL IT IS
(Ooo-ooh)
YOU ARE WHAT YOU IS
(Aaa-aah)
AN THAT'S ALL IT IS

And here we are, at the Mudd Club, y'all . . .
I hope you enjoy yourself, 'cause the show's about
To begin . . .

Hey, they're really dancin'
They're on auto-destruct
On the floor
On the pipe
Bouncin' off-a the wall

Hey, the people here are really
Tearin' it up
On the side
In the back
By the front of the stage

They ain't really crazy
You can take it from me
I should know
'Cause I go
Every time I'm in town

If you never tried it
Lemme straighten you out
It's the best kinda place
To unfasten yerself

MUDD CLUB
All the way downtown
MUDD CLUB
They ain't messin' around
MUDD CLUB
Just turn to the left 'n look around
Because it's there somewhere
If you ain't found it, better
Hurry up
Because the folks down there's on auto-destruct
And so can you be too
(The fact of the matter,
it's made for you . . . )

Try it on a Saturday about four o'clock in the mornin'
Or even on a Monday at midnight
When there's just a few of them
Fabulous Poodles
Doin' the Peppermint Twist for real
In a black sack dress with nine inch heels
And then a guy with a blue mohawk comes in
In Serious Leather . . .
(And all the rest of whom for which
To whensonever of partially indeterminate
Bio-chemical degradation
Seek the path to the sudsy yellow nozzle
Of their foaming nocturnal
Parametric whole-wheat inter-faith
Geo-thermal terpsichorean ejectamenta)
In Serious Leather . . .
In Serious Chains
In Serious Types Of Clothing
From when they come downtown
From the ruins of Studio '54
To twist 'n frugg
In an arrogant gesture
To the best of what the 20th Century has to offer
And I do mean offer
At the Mudd Club

Now, listen
Al Malkin is down there right now,
Looking for a virgin with nice breath . . .
(Maybe it's you, John . . .
And you don't even know it!)

Hey, they're really dancin'
They're on auto-destruct
On the floor
On the pipe
Bouncin' off-a the wall

Hey, the people here are really
Tearin' it up
On the side
In the back
By the front of the stage

They ain't really crazy
You can take it from me
I should know
'Cause I go
Every time I'm in town

If you never tried it
Lemme straighten you out
It's the best kinda place
To unfasten yerself

4. The Meek Shall Inherit Nothing - 3:21^<>

While you WORK THE WALL
WORK THE FLOOR
WORK THE PIPE
IN SERIOUS PAIN . . .

Some take the bible
For what it's worth
When it says that the meek
Shall inherit the Earth
Well, I heard that some sheik
Has bought New Jersey last week
'N you suckers ain't gettin' nothin'

Is Hare Rama really wrong
If you wander around
With a napkin on
With a bell on a stick
An' your hair is all gone . . .
(The geek shall inherit nothin')

You say yer life's a bum deal
'N yer up against the wall . . .
Well, people, you ain't even got no kinda
Deal at all
'Cause what they do
In Washington
They just takes care of NUMBER ONE
An' NUMBER ONE ain't YOU
You ain't even NUMBER TWO
(That's right!)

Those Jesus Freaks
Well, they're friendly but
The shit they believe
Has got their minds all shut
An' they don't even care
When the church takes a cut
Ain't it bleak when you got so much nothin'
(So whaddya do? Hey!)
Eat that pork
Eat that ham
Laugh till ya choke
On Billy Graham
Moses, Aaron 'n Abraham . . .
They're all a waste of time
'N it's your ass that's on the line
(IT'S YOUR ASS THAT'S ON THE LINE)

Do what you wanna
Do what you will
Just don't mess up
Your neighbor's thrill
'N when you pay the bill
Kindly leave a little tip
And help the next poor sucker
On his one way trip . . .
SOME TAKE THE BIBLE . . .
(Aw gimme a half a dozen for the hotel room!)

5. Cosmik Debris - 3:50^<>

The Mystery Man came over
An' he said: "I'm outa-site!"
He said, for a nominal service charge,
I could reach nervonna t'nite
If I was ready, willing 'n able
To pay him his regular fee
He would drop all the rest of his pressing affairs
And devote His Attention to me
But I said . . .
Look here brother,
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Now who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?)
Look here brother,
Don't you waste your time on me

The Mystery Man got nervous
An' he fidget around a bit
He reached in the pocket of his Mystery Robe
An' he whipped out a shaving kit
Now, I thought it was a razor
An' a can of foamin' goo
But I told him right then when the top popped open
There was nothin' his box won't do
With the oil of Afro-dytee
An' the dust of the Grand Wazoo
He said:
"You might not believe this, little fella, but it'll cure your Asthma too!"
An' I said . . .
Look here brother,
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Now what kind of a geroo are you anyway?)
Look here brother,
Don't you waste your time on me
That's right, don't waste yer time . . .

I've got troubles of my own, I said
An' you can't help me out
So take your meditations an' your preparations
An' ram it up yer snout
"BUT I GOT A KRISTL BOL!," he said
An' held it on up to the light
So I snatched it
All away from him
An' I showed him how to do it right
I wrapped a newspaper 'round my head
So I'd look like I was Deep
Said some Mumbo Jumbos then
I told him he was goin' to sleep
I robbed his rings
An' his pocket watch
An' everything else I found
Shit, I had that sucker hypnotized
He couldn't even make a sound
I proceeded to tell him his future then
As long as he was hanging around,
I said
"The price of meat has just gone up
An' yer ol' lady has just gone down . . . "
Look here brother,
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Now is that a real poncho or is that a Sears poncho? Huh?)
Don't you know,
You could make more money as a butcher,
So don't you waste your time on me
(Don't waste it, don't waste your time on me . . . )
Ohm shonty, ohm shonty, ohm shonty-ohm

6. Keep It Greasey - 2:58^<>

FZ: Thank you!

Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy

Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town

Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy

Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town

Hey, all the good women, they sure has it tough
The good men, well there just ain't enough
All the good girls are lookin' all the time
Good men is something that they can't find
But if they find one miraculously
They try to be lovin' as they can be
But if they find one and let him go
Chances are they might not never find one no mo'
So they . . .

Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy

Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town

A good lovin' man is hardest to find
A good woman needs to ease her mind
And I know a few that need to ease it behind
All y'gotta do is grease it down
'N everything is fine

Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy

Roll it over 'n grease it down
I'll drive you through the heart of town

A girl don't need
No fancy grease
To get herself
Some rump release
Any kind
Of lube'll do
Maybe from another
Part of you
Lube from the North
Lube from the South
Take a little slobber
From the side of your mouth
From your mouth
From your mouth
From your mouth
From your mouth
Roll it over
Grease it down
Here come that crazy
Screamin' sound . . .

Aaah . . . ah-ah-a-aah
(Come on, sing along!)
Aaah . . . ah-ah-a-aah
Aaah . . . ah-ah-a-aah
(Oh nooo!)
Aaah . . . ah-ah-a-aah

Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Keep it greasey so it'll go down easy
Roll it over 'n grease it down (DOWN), down (DOW-HOWN), down (DOW-HOW-HOWN)
Grease it dow-how-hown . . .
Oh no! Here comes that screamin' sound again . . .

7. Tinsel Town Rebellion - 4:19^<>

FZ: Thank you! This is a song about the punk bands that come from Los Angeles.

From Madam Wong's to Starwood
To the Whiskey on the Strip
You can hear the crashing, blasting strum
Of bands that come to be real hip
And get a record contract
From a talent scout some day
They'll sell their ass, their cocks and balls
They'll take the check 'n walk away
If they're lucky they'll get famous
For a week or two perhaps
They'll buy some ugly clothes to wear
And hope the business don't collapse
Before some stupid magazine
Decides they're really good
They're a Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
From downtown Hollywood

Tinsel Town Rebellion,
Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
Tinsel Town Rebellion,
Tinsel Town Rebellion Band

They used to play all kinds of stuff
And some of it was nice
Some of it was musical
But then they took this guy's advice
To get a record deal, he said,
They'd have to be more punk
Forget their chops and play real dumb
Or else they would be sunk
So off they go to S.I.R. to learn some stupid riffs
And practice all their poses
In between their powder sniffs

Chop a line now

And when they think they've got it
They launch a new career
Who gives a fuck if what they play
Is somewhat insincere

Tinsel Town Rebellion,
Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
Tinsel Town Rebellion,
Tinsel Town Rebellion Band
In Tinsel Town the people there
They think substance is a bore
And if your New Wave group looks good
They'll hurry on back for more
Of leather groups and plastic groups
And groups that act real queer
The Tinsel Town aficionados
Come to see and not to hear
But then again this system works
As perfect as a dream
It works for all of those record company pricks
Who come to skim the cream
From the cesspools of excitement
Where Jim Morrison once stood
It's the Tinsel Town Rebellion
From downtown Hollywood

8. Buffalo Drowning Witch - 2:44^<>

There is a ship arriving too late
To save a drowned-ing kind of a witch
She was swimmin' along
Tryin' to keep a date
With a Merchant Marine
Who told her he was really rich
But it doesn't matter no more . . .
She's on the ocean floor
'N the water's all green down there
'N it's not very clean down there
'N the pointed hat
Well she's got water in that
'N water snakes
'N rusty wrecks
Is all that she can see
As the light goes dim
And she's tryin' to swim
Will she make it?
(Boy, we sure hope so . . . )

Not even a witch oughta be caught
On the bottom of America's spew-infested
Waterways
She could get radiation all over her
She could mutate insanely . . .
And then if she ever got out of the liquid entrapment
She could grow to be 15 feet tall
And scary-lookin'
Even more so than a pre-moistened witch oughta be
And then she might go on the freeway
She could cause accidents
While people looked at her
Cars could crash all over the place
From the result of people with Hawaiian shirts on . . .
Lookin' up to see her face
With seaweed and urchins
Emphasizing her cheekbones
Wow! She can really be ugly and scary looking

Sardines in her eyebrows . . .
Lobsters up 'n down her forehead
All of them TERRIBLY LARGE FROM RADIATION . . .
And DANGEROUS!
And smelling very bad

I don't know
Maybe it's better if she stays in the water
And a submarine could save her,
And take her home to the Navy . . .
For some kind of
Ritual sacrifice . . .

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me

He was the Playboy Type (he smoked a pipe)
His fav'rite phrase was "OUTA-SITE!"
He had an Irish Setter
(Ah, bejeezus, here we go again)

It was a singles bar . . .
Wait a minute, let's do that part again . . .
It was a singles bar . . .
Da-da-dah . . . the band was tight
They did the Bump together

What a splendid sight
(Roon doon doon doon)
Her teeth were white
(Oo-ooh ah-ooh)
The drinks were cheap (it was Ladies Nite)
He was glad that he met her

She was an office girl ("My name is Betty")
Her fav'rite group was HELEN REDDY
(They discussed-ed the weather)

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!

She was a lonely sort, just a little too short
Her jokes were dumb and her fav'rite sport
Was hockey (in the winter)

He was duly impressed and was quick to suggest
Any sport with a PUCK . . .
Why can't I remember the words of this song?
He was duly impressed and was quick to suggest
Any sport with a PUCK had to be 'bout the best
As he jabbed his elbow in her

Later on they went off to where the music was soft,
The candles were drippy, they saw a REAL HIPPY
Who delivered their dinner

The rice was brown, and soon they found
That the crowd around that had jammed the room,
Well it seemed to be getting thinner

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!

He took her home to a motor court
Tried to kiss her . . . (he tried to ignore it)
Wait a minute, no . . .
No, no, I got it backwards
He took her home to a motor court
She tried to kiss . . . (mumble-mumble)
And made him angry!

He called her a . . .
And she slammed the door
(The door!)
In a petulant frenzy!
(A petulant frenzy!
This is a petulant
Frenzy!
I'm petulant,
And I'm having a frenzy!)

On the sofa she weeps
BOO HOO HOO HOO
She weeps and she weeps
BOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO
She weeps and she peeps
Through the curtain

He just got in his car
But the battery's dead
So he asked to use the phone
And she gives him some head
And that's the end of the story

Ooh! Atlantis!

Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a man like me
Honey honey, hey
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Baby don't you want a
Man!
Baby don't you want a man sometimes?

Why not come over?
You'll meet my mother
You'll meet my sister
You'll like my brother
Really you will . . .
Yeah!

I'm learning English
I can say "thank you"
I think I like you
Do you like my band-aid?
I hope you do . . .

I am not busy
I'm free to travel
Where are you going?
Maybe you'll take me
I hope you do . . .

Do you know Vinnie?
He used to like me
I speak good English
I'm bathing with Peter
Pick me, I'm clean . . .

Vinnie goes bare-back
Peter goes wet-back
Denny goes way back
Eddie should get back
Pick me I'm clean . . .

Oh yeah, pick me I'm clean
Oh yeah, check out my band-aid
Oh yeah, pick me I'm clean
Oh yeah, check out my band-aid
Oh yeah, pick me I'm clean
Oh yeah, check out my band-aid
Oh yeah, pick me I'm clean
Oh yeah . . .

Why not come over?
You'll meet my mother
You'll meet my sister
You'll like my brother
Really you will . . .

I'm learning English
I can say "thank you"
I think I like you
Do you like my band-aid?
I hope you do . . .

I am not busy
I'm free to travel
Where are you going?
Maybe you'll take me
I hope you do . . .

Do you know Vinnie?
He used to like me
I speak good English
I'm bathing with Peter
Pick me, I'm clean . . .

11. Dead Girls Of London - 3:02^<>

Can you see what they are
Do you hear what they say
People it is sad but true
They dress really stupid but they think they're okay
And they've got no use for you
Oh the Dead Girls of London
Why do they act that way?

Maybe it's the water, mama
Maybe it's the tea
Maybe it's the way they was raised
Maybe it's the stuff what they read in the papers
Keeps 'em lookin' sorta half in a daze
Oh the Dead Girls of London
Why do they act that way?

We're the Dead Girls of London
We thinks we are fine
We ain't hittin' on nothin'
But the boutique frame of mind

Come on, Dempsey!

You see 'em dancin' at the Disco
Every night like a bunch of little robot queens
Makin' little noises full of fake delight
But they're really just so full of beans
Oh the Dead Girls of London
Why do they act that way?

We're the Dead Girls of London
We thinks we are fine
We ain't hittin' on nothin'
But the Bonjour frame of mind

Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!
Bonjour!

Mike Scheller says his life is a mess
Fritz Rau says asparagus
Should only be consumed
By people with a large amount
In an unmarked bank account, ou-ou-ou-ou-ount

Shall we take ourselves seriously?
Shall we talk about it all night long?
Shall we think we are so evolved?
Will we be depressed
If we're wrong?

Shall we take ourselves seriously?
Shall we take ourselves elsewhere?
Shall we drink while we squat there
In the middle of this stupid song?

Shall we never go out there?
Shall we take us where we don't belong
When we notice the Spargel is gone?
Shall we weep in the box office dawn
(Go away I'm no good for you)

Are the tickets all counted?
Are the costs all accounted for?
Shall we bring up the Spargel
For discussion at least once more?

Shall we take ourselves seriously?
Shall we think we are so mature?
Shall we be very wrong
At the end of this song?
Yes we will ever more
(Yes we will ever more)

13. City Of Tiny Lites - 9:58^<>

City of tiny lites
Don't you wanna go
Hear the tiny auto horns
When they tiny blow
Tiny lightnin'
In the storm
Tiny blankets
Gonna keep you warm
Tiny pillows
Tiny tiny tiny tiny sheets
Talkin' bout them tiny cookies
That the peoples eat

City of tiny lites
Maybe you should know
That it's over there
In the tiny dirt somewhere
You can see it any time
When you get the squints
From your downers and your wine
You're so big
It's so tiny
Every cloud is silver line-y
The great escape for all of you
Tiny is as tiny do
Tiny is as tiny do
Tiny is as tiny do
Tiny is as tiny do

City of tiny lites
Don't you wanna go
Hear the tiny auto horns
When they tiny blow
Tiny lightnin'
In the storm
Tiny pillows, tiny blankets, yeah
Gonna keep, keep, keep you so warm
Tiny pillows
Tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny tiny sheets
Talkin' bout them tiny cookies
That the peoples eats
Oh, city of tiny lites
Maybe, maybe you should know

And it's over there
Well, and It's over there
Said, and It's over there
Well, and It's over there

14. Easy Meat - 9:26^<>

This girl is easy meat
I seen her on the street
See-through blouse an' a tiny little dress
Her manner indiscreet . . . I knew she was
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

She wanna take me home
Make me sweat and moan
Rub my head and beat me off
With a copy of Rollin' Stone
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

I told her I was late
I had another date
I can't get off on the Rollin' Stone
But the robots think it's great . . . I knew she was
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy, easy meat
Easy, easy,
Easy, easy
Easy meat, easy meat, easy meat, easy meat

Easy
She was so easy
Easy
I saw her tiny titties
Shooh her tee-shooh . . . ha ha!
I saw her tiny titties
Shooh her . . .
I saw her tiny titties
Through her see-through blouse
Just had to take the girl to my house
Easy
Meat

Ain't got no heart
I ain't got no heart to give away
I sit and laugh at fools in love
There ain't no such thing as love
(Ha ha ha!)
No angels singing up above today

Girl I don't believe
Girl I don't believe in what you say
You say your heart is only mine
I say to you, you must be blind
What makes you think that you're so fine
That I would throw away
The groovy life I lead
'Cause baby, what you've got, yeah
It sure ain't what I need

Girl you'd better go
Girl you'd better go away
I think that life with you would be
Just not quite the thing for me
Why is it so hard to see my way

Why should I be stuck with you
(Stuck with you)
It's just not what I want to do
(Want to do)
Why should an embrace or two
(Embrace or two)
Make me such a part of you
(Part of you)
I ain't got no heart to give away
Away
No no no no no no no
Ain't got no heart
Ain't got no heart
I ain't got no heart to give away

FZ: Thank you!

Flies all green 'n buzzin' in his dungeon of despair
Prisoners grumble and piss their clothes and scratch their matted hair
A tiny little light from a window hole a hundred yards away
Is all they ever get to know about the regular life in the day;
An' it stinks so bad the stones been chokin'
'N weepin' greenish drops
In the room where the giant fire puffer works
'N the torture never stops
The torture never stops
The torture
The torture
The torture never stops

Slime 'n rot, rats 'n snot 'n vomit on the floor
Fifty ugly soldiers holdin' spears by the iron door
Knives 'n spikes 'n guns 'n the likes of every tool of pain
An' a sinister little midget with a bucket an' a mop
A sinister little midget with a bucket an' a mop
A sinister tiny little midget with a bucket an' a mop
Where the blood goes down the drain;
An' it stinks so bad the stones been chokin'
'N weepin' greenish drops
In the room where the giant fire puffer works
'N the torture never stops
The torture never stops
The torture
The torture
The torture never stops.

Flies all green 'n buzzin'
In his dungeon of despair
An evil kind of a prince
Eats a steamin' kind of a pig
In a chamber right near there
He eats
The snouts 'n the trotters first
The loin's 'n the groin's are soon dispersed
His carvin' style is well rehearsed
He stands and shouts
All men be cursed
All men be cursed
All men be cursed
And disagree, well let me tell you, no-one durst
He's the best of course of all the worst
(He's the best of course of all the worst)
Some wrong been done, he done it first
(Some wrong been done, he done it first)
An' he stinks so bad, his bones been chokin'
'N weepin' greenish drops,
In the night of the iron sausage,
Where the torture never stops
The torture never stops
The torture
The torture
The torture never stops.

Flies all green 'n buzzin' in his dungeon of despair
Who are all these people that he's locked away down there
Are they crazy?,
Are they sainted?
Are they zeros someone painted?,
Well, it's never been explained since at first it was created
But a dungeon just like a sin
Requires naught but lockin' in
Of everything that's ever been
Look at her
Look at him
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in
That's what's the deal we're dealing in

Hey! Do you know what you are?
You're an asshole! ASSHOLE!

Some of you might not agree
'Cause you probably likes a lot of misery
But think a while and you will see . . .
Broken hearts are for assholes
Broken hearts are for assholes
Are you an asshole?
Broken hearts are for assholes
Are you an asshole too?
Whatcha gonna do, 'cause you're an asshole . . .

No no no, yeah yeah yeah
I said
You . . . are . . . an ASSHOLE!

Maybe you think you're a lonely guy
'N maybe you think you're too tough to cry
So you went to The Grape,
Just to give it a try
And Dagmar
Was his name . . .
The whiskers sticking out from underneath of his Pancake make-up
Nearly drove you insane
And so you kissed a little sailor
Who had just blew in from Spain
You pulled the chain attached to the permanently-erected nipples of Jimmy
In a bold salute to pain
You sniffed the reeking buns of Angel
And acted like it was cocaine
You were dazzled by the exciting new costume of Ko-Ko
In a way you can't explain
And so you worked the wall with Michael
Which gave your back an awful strain
But you came back on Sunday for the gong show
But you forgot what I was sayin'
'Cause you're an asshole, You're an asshole
That's right
You're an asshole, you're an asshole
That's right
You're an asshole, you're an asshole
That's right
You're an asshole, you're an asshole

Well, you been to The Grape, you been to The Chest
Now I think you know what you are: you're an asshole
Asshole

You say you can't live with what you've been through
Well, ladies you can be an asshole too
You might pretend you ain't got one on the bottom of you
But don't fool yerself girl
It's lookin' at you
Don't fool yerself girl
It's winkin' at you
Don't fool yerself girl
It's blinkin' at you
That's why I say
I'm gonna ram it, ram it, ram it
Ram it up yer poop chute
Corn hole
Ram it, ram it, ram it
Ram it up yer poop chute
Fist fuck
Ram it, ram it, ram it
Ram it up yer poop chute
Wrist-watch: Crisco
Ram it, ram it, ram it
Ram it up yer poop chute
Ah!
Don't fool yerself, girl,
It's goin' right up yer poop chute
Don't fool yerself, girl,
It's goin' right up yer poop chute
Don't fool yerself, girl,
It's goin' right up yer poop chute
(Ay ay ay ay)
Don't fool yerself, girl,
It's goin' right up yer poop chute
(Ay ay ay ay)
Don't fool yerself, girl,
It's goin' right up yer poooop chute
(Ay ay ay ay ay ay ay ay)
Don't fool yerself, girl,
It's goin' right up yer . . .

Aw, I knew you'd be surprised . . .

One Two Three Four!

Feelin' sorry
Feelin' sad
So many ugly people
I feel bad
I'm so cute
They're so homely
Some of them
At home 'n lonely
Wish they could be
Very cute like me
They will never
Get to be
Some folks got it
Some folks don't
Some so ugly
They never won't